It's Valentines Day!
...And you are here browsing cartoon ponies. Fear not though! You are not alone. We will get you that romance you crave! Let EQD be your guide in this overwhelming sea of horsey love!
Today we dive into 10 potential picks to help you through these trying times! They just happen to have hooves. And flanks. And whatever a hock is. I should really know these things.
Below the break, get a primed selection of lonely
Just for cuddling, of course.
#hiatus2018
Princess Luna
CELEBRATE THE MOON~
It's magical, exotic, and represents a time where the majority of more interesting fun happens. How about dating the embodiment of that?
Join her in learning about the modern pony. Back in her day, you'd be hard pressed to see even a cutie mark exposed in public. The crazy things ponies do and buy these days in the name of romance are overwhelming to someone who has been gone for 1000 years. She's heard rumors about a more seedy part of her fair city and needs you, her newest love ambassador to explore it with her. Do they really have entire shops dedicated just to ...that?
Of course, they weren't all prudes back then. Behind closed doors, the frustrated ponies of the day became absolute monsters at night. You've heard of the ROYAL CANTERLOT VOICE, but rumor has it there is an opposite version used only in private company. Are you prepared for the breathy bedroom whisper? I hear it sent her last suitor straight to the moon~
Coco Pommel
Coco Pommel: an independent mare who don't need no stallion.
She'd love a human though. Think of how helpful those fingers would be in dress making. She's not a unicorn, so she already has a disadvantage over fellow fashion ponies like Rarity. BE HER HORN! Make Dresses! Bask in her overwhelming happiness as the pin she has been trying to thread with her clumsy hooves for the last week is finally complete. What a relief...
Hit up high class Manehattan restaurants during down time, a theater play, or just travel the country on one of her artistic inspirational journeys while she searches for her newest muse. The twist? Her muse was with her all along.
How romantic~
Octavia
For the more musically inclined among us, nothing beats this classy mare right here. She may live in the country with Vinyl, but she's anything but a bumpkin. Get VIP treatment at one of her upcoming Canterlot shows entertaining some of the most important ponies in Equestria, or just chill with her at one of Ponyville's many parks. She goes either way.
Not a huge fan of orchestral music? Not a problem. She loves to experiment. Combine all sorts of complex melodies both vocal and rhythmic. She might even invite Vinyl in for a jam session if you treat her good. You wouldn't be the first.
Moondancer
Moony just recently escaped her reclusive lifestyle, and is on the prowl for someone to show her beyond the bounds of regular friendship. She's bookish and nerdy with a willingness to learn that surpasses even her childhood bestie.
She even bought you a matching sweater for those cold winter Canterlot nights, though her studies have noted that "Two individuals attracted to one another may see an increase in temperature when paired together in the same room as one another, so it's perfectly fine if you don't want to wear it all the time!".
Will you guide her through the awkward haze clouding her inexperienced mind on the subject of courtship? Will you show her the way to love? Her curiosity is more than peaked. It's time to help her mold it~
Cheerilee
Cheerilee is getting up there in years, and starting to feel a bit discouraged at her lack romantic success. Even her cheerleader outfit didn't get anything except a few stares from overly enthusiastic fathers and angry looks from their wives. Her social circle is the absolute worst for this!
The poor mare has poured so much of her heart into raising the next generation of Ponyville's finest, that she's afraid she has used it all up! Show her that her early 30's crisis is all in her head. Make her feel beautiful again just like the swarms of colts did back in high school. The bright green eyes, beautiful magenta coat, and cheery disposition drew them in droves. They saw the potential here.
It's time for her newest student to take the ultimate test! Will you pass?
Zecora
Sometimes, the average Equestrian mare just doesn't do it for you. You've been with the unicorns, the pegasus, the earth ponies, and bagged every color and combination of colors the rainbow has to offer multiple times. What's a pony playa to do?
How about a Zebra? Experience the deep and beautiful culture of Zebrica with just a quick hike through the Everfree. Zecora will show you things regular ponies could never even dream of. Seriously, Luna peeked in once and couldn't stop blushing for a week.
Imbibe potions that replenish your stamina and elixirs that double it. The only time you will ever want to leave, is to gather more ingredients.
Cloudchaser
Cloudchaser does everything with her twin sister.
Everything
Vapor Trail
Sky Stinger you say? Forget about him. If he hasn't realized that this little mare isn't the ultimate catch by now, he's probably off chasing stallions.
Just look at Vapor Trail. She's like an adorable little cloud. She spent her entire life propping up a douchebag. It's time for you to rescue her!
She wants nothing more than to support and love you. Show her what it's like to have that kind of dedication returned. Give her the world, and she will return with the universe~
Minuette
Lets be real. Pinkie Pie is great and all, but sometimes you need a break. With her, that wouldn't exist. You'd be taking a nice, peaceful bath when suddenly the water would stop and a pony head would be sticking out of the faucet demanding attention. An unintentional insult might send her spiraling off into mental areas no good relationship deserves. In other words, don't stick your... di- relationship* in crazy
Luckily we have the perky excitement of Pinkie with the down-to-earth reality of Canterlot's #1 dental hygienist. She's fun loving and adventurous one moment, but gives you breathing room when you need some alone time. Just watch the calories. Pones digest sugars differently with that extra couple degrees in ambient body temperature. She loves her donuts, but you might want to grab a salad instead during one of her many trips to Joe's.
Not that she wouldn't be able to clean your teeth if you happen to indulge in one too many fried pastries though... With or without her dental tools~
*Family friendly post
Mayor Mare
A position just opened for Mayor Mare's personal secretary, and she's thinking her usual stallion assistants are getting a little stale. Minotaurs are a bit too intense for her liking, but this new-fangled human that just moved into town looks intriguing.
Are you willing to put age aside in exchange for decades worth of experience? Ms. Mare was in her prime during Equestria's free-spirit golden age, and she wants to show you what four hooves can really do that only a pony of her maturity can show you. Kids these days with their silly internet videos don't know how it really works!
On top of that, she's more than willing to approve the plans for that extra room you wanted to add to your cottage... as long as she gets to use it every once in a while.
Trixie
CLAIMED
What am I even doing with my life
I'm sorry.
