TRIXIEEEEE.
She's back! She teamed up with Glimglam! The world was SHAKEN TO IT'S CORE. I invoked EQD rule #37 and commandeered this followup DICTATOR STYLE.
I'll be square with you. This post has a lot of Trixie. You may even be overwhelmed. It's alright though. Who could hate Trixie now? She is both humble and apologetic, as well as great and full of herself. It's the perfect combo. It hits all buttons.
Now go. Glimglam and Trixie below.
IT IS TIME. SO MUCH HYPE.
Imagine my surprise when my Trixie substitute was about to meet my Trixie. I've been a huge Glimglam fan since the very beginning, even when you all doubted her. Just like Trixie! And look! She delivered. The way she acts is pretty much a mirror image of the Greatest and Most Powerful mare.
And shes cute. Look at that face.
Can't you let other ponies win even once Twilight?!
See? Look at that. You triggered her. Good work princess of friendship.
Obligatory scrunchy face.
That post cake-crafting moment when unicorn realizes she can take over all lesser pony races.
We get it, you vape.
Hurr I know, The most obvious joke ever. I'm just here for TRIXIE.
It's alright when ponies do it. Superior cartoon and character models
5 SEASONS OF TREATING FLUTTERBUTTER LIKE DIRT LEAD TO THIS MOMENT. SAVE HER FROM THAT TERRIBLE RABBIT [bat pony] GLIMGLAM!
B...but don't ditch her afterward!
Someone name the umbrella mare. The new OC's they are using for this season are so much more detailed than the endless Lyra recolors we used to have.
Inb4 she has been around since season 1 and has 30 hardcore heavy shipping fanfics.
Obligatory BEST FRIENDS and 4chan pony. Dats cute.
(Yes Yes but where is TRIXIE?)
And so are these three. I freakin' love these new ponies. Keep them coming!
Inb4 these three have had an entire subfandom universe built around them way back 3 years ago that I've never heard of.
I know for sure that this is a NEW spa pony! How many spa sisters are there now? 12? Is there a cloning facility somewhere underneath Ponyville? Will this show finally end on an episode about Celestia pumping out ponies to fill in slots of anti-solar dissenters? We started catching on during season one. There were clone ponies all over the place. Clearly it meant something. Now they are just swapping manes. What if ALL ponies are clones. Does that explain the body type most of them share? Is everything a lie?
Seriously though. Trixie soon yes?
WHATS THAT I SEE?!
If we didn't get that teaser before the episode, this would have been the most incredible OH GOD WHO IS THAT moment ever, but with a lot more celebratory swear words.
EVEN WITH THE TEASER ITS STILL YESYESYESYESYES MODE.
SHE'S BACK
SHE'S BEING OUT-SMIRKED BY TWILIGHT... Come on Twilight...
We fix that now....
DEDICATED TRIXIE TIME
COMMENCE
FINALLY AFTER FOUR INCREDIBLY LONG YEARS
THE GREATEST AND MOST POWERFUL PONY
IN ALL OF EQUESTRIA
HAS GRACED OUR HUMBLE LITTLE FANDOM
WITH HER ELECTRIFYING PRESENCE
AND THE SHOW HAS IMPROVED TENFOLD BECAUSE OF IT
PRAISE TRIXIE
MAY HER MAGIC EMPOWER US AS WE MOVE ON TO AN AGE OF WONDER
...I'M RUNNING OUT OF THINGS TO CANTERLOCK
TRIXIE RULES
TWILIGHT DROOLS
Oh don't give me that Purplesmart. You had 2 and a half full seasons. She deserves it, and THAT IS ART. I bet you couldn't recreate yourself out of spoons and forks. A clearly superior tornado of a pony has swept her way through and destroyed your boring "perfect silverware placement" with CREATIVITY.
Alright. I feel better now.
Oh, and she still has a single eye dot.
Superior to dual dot.
TRIXIE BREAK ENDS
Fifty Shades of Glimglam
Written by: Sethisto Scootaloo
"Oh Starlight! I'm so glad I met you. But can I tell you a secret? Promise you won't tell anypony!"
"Uhh, sure Trixie. What's up?"
"It's just that... every time I look at you I can't help but feel butterflies! The way your mane has improved so much since last season... the glimmer in your starry eyes... It makes me feel like I'm light as a feather!"
"That makes me so happyTrixie! I've been wanting to confess forever! Your perfect silver mane and wonderful single eye dot... I feel the same way~"
"Well, where do we go from here? I'm kind of new to this whole friendship thing..."
"Maybe it's time to take our relationship to the next level? Seal the deal as it were?"
"Definitely"
"Definitely"
"The Great and Powerful Trixie has all sorts of fun ways to celebrate our love! Ropes, hoofcuffs, a magic wand, you name it, Trixie can supply it or your bits back!"
"Of course, if you aren't comfortable with any of that, Trixie is still an expert on her own... without any tools."
"Just say the word and Trixie will guide you into any fantasy you wish."
"This all seems incredible Trixie, but what if I'm no good at it? I have no idea how any of this works..."
"Oh don't you worry your pretty little mane Starry! Trixie will guide you through everything. Consider it a REAL friendship lesson~"
"You can trust Trixie right? Show that obnoxious Twilight Sparkle what a second chance really is~"
"You're right Trixie. Lets do this!"
"NO"
Uhh right. SFW Blog.
Anyway, something something Hoofdini parody magic trick. Trixie so ambitious~
Panda mode activate. I don't know if Vinyl Scratch was the best choice here. It doesn't hurt the episode in any way, it just felt kind of out of place. Maybe a pony that Twilight Sparkle is more friendly with, like Cheerilee or Minuette.
And I'm not just saying that because I watched the Minuette scene
Derpy wins by default though. How many ponies are at the peak of their adorableness when they are crashing into things? I can dig it.
VECTOR IT
The real Trixie is starting to break through here. I actually thought she'd go evil mode in the end, especially during the next scene. It had all the makings of a "Trixie Tantrum!"™
Celestia is kind of a douche here, not gonna lie. 1000 years and she never had a no show? Come on Cele! Twilight's going to lose her mind! You know where this leads!
Can we all agree now that Trixie is cutest poni when she's ready to ENTERTAIN CROWDS!? Make Equestria great again one Humble and Penitent Trixie's Equestrian Apology Tour at a time!
Twilight Sparkle layin' down the law. I have to admit, Glimglam not at least warning her wasn't the best friendship thing ever.
The PINNACLE OF THE EPISODE is clearly when Trixie drops the bomb that is her trademark evil laugh.
From here, things get a little dark!
Absolutely soul wrenching!
Completely devastating!
Make it stop!
I don't know if it was intended, but the way this scene plays out can potentially have some super dark context to it. The way Trixie speaks during her opening presentation sounds like a mare who has given up on life entirely. She almost made her very first friend, and everything collapsed once again.
There really was no going back at that point. Either Glimglam, who really had no hint at all of returning, would come and save her, or Trixie was done.
The fact that she came out of it clearly wounded and woozy from lack of oxygen hints at this being The Great and Powerful Trixie's reluctant final act. There wasn't a backup plan here. She clearly had no way to complete the trick alone.
It could just be the mark of a magician afraid to go back on her promised stunt and hoping she can pull it off, or, more darkly, a planned ending for a sad pony. The monotone speech I mentioned earlier seems to hint that she really was just done.
I KID
Freakin' fandom. Look at that manticore bowing. The dude was TOTALLY in on it. Trixie knew she had an out all along. TRIXIE IS UNSLAYABLE. He would have spit the silly pony out and it would have been business as usual. Now stop sending me depressing emails, skype messages, and steam messages.
And while you are closing Gmail out, lets consider the implications of this new assistant / magician friendship! I don't know about you... but I think it's time to embrace your
NEW MANE 8TH
TRIXIE TIME.
Sethisto OUT!
