Author: The_EE
Description: An unfortunate accident lands Ponyville's local mailmare in the hospital and her daughter in the care of the town's resident librarian. How will she manage in taking care of the filly? And what is Derpy Hooves hiding?Postal Blues and Grey Feathers
Additional Tags: Lots of words. Also, muffins. Friendshipping
51 kommentaari:
Derpy is best pony!
VastaKustutacute ^_^
VastaKustutaSounds good
VastaKustutaDerpy gets hurt! NOOOOOO!
VastaKustutaThe author here,
VastaKustutaThe version that is currently up is the wrong one! This is the version that was sent to the pre-readers, and as such contains some errors that were fixed on the second round!
I've emailed the site about the issue.
Please wait until the right one goes up.
@The_EE: You could post a link to the correct document in these comments, you know.
VastaKustuta@Jordan
VastaKustutaTrue, how come I didn't think of that...
Here's the link:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nGwdprmiz4pONw1NlHgnD58_yHjmCPerfX6PSYw4Fp4/edit?pli=1
Apologies for the mix-up!
Now I get to enjoy this mistake-free!
VastaKustuta*squee*
Derpy fic? Yes please.
VastaKustutaInsta-read. :3
Utterly a-D'AWWWW-able, such a pleasure to read. :)
VastaKustutaAnd it was good
VastaKustuta@The_EE
VastaKustutaAs someone with editing power for the offending document, why don't you just copypasta the new one into the old one, so that both links are to identical documents. That way nobody reads the old one.
@Sgt Byrd
VastaKustutaToo many people (+50) viewing the document, can't edit when it's read only. Otherwise I would have done just that.
I hope the right version goes up soon, it's a lot better than the old one.
However, I find it quite fitting that a Derpy story would have its post, well, derped, like this.
This made my day. Thank you very much for writing this.
VastaKustutaI don't always read fanfics, but when I do , it's a Derpy fic. In all seriousness though this was an good read, thanks for sharing this with us.
VastaKustuta@The_EE
VastaKustutaOIC, that's one of the most annoying things about GDocs.
If you put it as a published doc then nobody can easily save a copy, and if you put it like currently with edit, then you can't edit your own doc if other people are even just viewing it.
Been doing a little experimenting and from the GDocs home it is actually possible to alter the doc's visibility settings without opening it, so that only you can view it, everyone else will get access denied. Then you can open it, make the changes, then make it visible again. Kinda kludge-y but it gets the job done. Right click on the doc then select share, then you can decide the sharing options.
GDocs isn't really designed for handling fiction tbh. Seth could make things easier by putting two links:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1cttBXozvawX2hqYkl60F9VAdqfreE4uJ8cgCJiilWYo/edit
With edit at the end for people to get the GDocs file menu to download. Or:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1cttBXozvawX2hqYkl60F9VAdqfreE4uJ8cgCJiilWYo/preview
With preview at the end just to view it. That way the number of people counted as "editing" wouldn't balloon so fast.
really?
VastaKustutaDerpy Hooves will make the filly insane
@Sgt Byrd
VastaKustutaThanks for the tip, even if it came a little late to help me. Haven't really used Docs that much myself.
Anyway, the mistake has been fixed and the link now points to the correct version. Thanks to EQD for fixing this so quickly.
Oh, and of course thanks to everyone for reading and commenting so far!
@The_EE
VastaKustutaNo problem, might I shamelessly advertise, erm suggest, fimfiction.net.
The guy that runs it seems pretty committed to it, it has features more tailored to fics and is really user friendly.
Wow, I read that and cried almost the whole time. This was a really moving story, and adding twilight as a friend really helped. All I'm saying is, whoever the author is, you're really talented
VastaKustutaWhat is this salty discharge coming from my eyes?
VastaKustutaThat story was d'awwww.
Also, yes, fimfiction would be an excellent place for this to go.
Also, on a side note, 18917 words!
This was awesome as a big derpy and dinky fan this made my heart melt.
VastaKustutaThat was awesome, we need more stories like that.
VastaKustutaManliest thing I'v ever read.
VastaKustutaI tip my hat to you good Sir.
This story right here? Pure awesome.
VastaKustutaThe author? Genius.
My face now? Somanyfeels.
Seriously, a wonderful tale. I always love me some Derpy and Dinky love. Need more o' that, I think.
Manly tears were shed this day
VastaKustutaAutor on selle kommentaari eemaldanud.
VastaKustutaA very touching story, guess Derpy never realized how much Ponyville cares about her and how they'll come through when needed the most
VastaKustutaA really good story. Good job on expanding Derpy's personality.
VastaKustutaOk, I don't want to be a huge dissenting voice here but...
VastaKustutaI didn't think this fic was all that. It wasn't bad, no, and it was certainly well written (though the introduction was a bit hammy), but I mainly just found the whole thing a bit too cliche. In addition, there just didn't seem to be much to the central plot of Twilight taking care of Dinky, it kinda felt like very "and this is what should happen, and then this".
The worst, though, is the whole premise of Dinky being adopted in the first place. It makes absolutely no sense. The very reason Dinky was cast as Ditzy/Derpy's daughter in the first place was because of how similar they look. When you add adoption, that goes completely out the window. When you add the now-canon fact that ponies can birth a different type from themselves it just makes it that much more stupid.
Now don't get me wrong, it was a sweet story, I just didn't get all that much out of it.
I suck at reviews, so sorry about the lack of a decent critique.
VastaKustutaThought this was great, well written, and the characters actually felt like themselves.
Especially liked how Derpy was, well, normal.
Hope this is only part/chapter one. :)
Autor on selle kommentaari eemaldanud.
VastaKustutaI don't read fanfics very often, but that was a bloody good read.
VastaKustutaIs this a work in progress?
VastaKustutaAbsolutely magnificent.
VastaKustutaI was worried for some of it you were going to hit us with some second tragedy but you managed to maintain with the perfect balance of sympathetic sadness and heartwarming.
Beautifully written and you have melted my heart this day.
Bravo sir.
I- Wow. I mean just wow. That... That was just so touching... And I can understand Derpy's "Money is tight" thing, me and my mom had the same issue. I just loved this touching story. Also: When Twilight said is was a little past midnight, I read the sentence like 5 minutes after midnight... HOW DID THAT HAPPEN.
VastaKustutaExcellent story. Derpy shouldn't be so lonely =(
VastaKustutaInstant 5 stars.
I'd love to see a followup story, if inspiration strikes you.
by god this was one of the best Derpy Hooves/Dinky Hooves fanfics ive read so far
VastaKustutaby god this was one of the best Derpy Hooves/Dinky Hooves fanfics ive read so far
VastaKustutaAuthor, just want to say I have never been one for fanfiction, but this had me hooked the whole way though. Very touching story, had tears in my eyes the whole time and had to take a few short breaks to listen to a certain happy song from the latest episode.
VastaKustutaExcellent Job :D
I liked it alot. Very touching and sweet.
VastaKustutaThat was freaking amazing. You captured the emotions of a grieving child so well...it's just amazing. Five stars for sure.
VastaKustutaHello, the author here.
VastaKustutaI just wanted to thank everyone for reading, rating and commenting. I tried quite a few new things with this one, so I'm happy to see that it has gotten such a warm reception.
So, uh... not much else to say really. Thanks for the comments, they are always appreciated!
>in practice the results had been rather underwhelming thus far, with frequent outages.
VastaKustuta-Does it work on Windows Millennium ? (and now I fell old, because of that reference...)
>“She has a daughter, Dinky. Derpy is a single mother.
-And proud to be. Both are doing great together.
>She knew Dinky was adopted
-...*squint eyes angrily* What ? A pegasus can’t have a unicorn as a daughter, without being ‘adopted’ ? The genetics works PERFECTLY fine for that, you know.
>We'll have to clear it with the social worker, but I doubt they will resist your idea too much.
-Yeah, being Celestia’s prime student, semi-known hero, and respected-trusted mare in Ponyville... I doubt they could have been able to find a better pony for the job.
>“Mom likes dandelions,” the filly said. >“She likes the way they turn into cotton when they get old
-Mmh... I see, in the future, the yellow ‘flowers’ growing old... becoming white and fluffy, as Derpy finally wakes up, and sees them.
Like a subtle sign of progression, that marks the end, as the seeds fly away.
*cough* Hum, that would be nice.
... So far, the reaction from EVERY ponies was simply... very appropriate, excellent. I’m a bit surprised, yet even more interested to see, if the trend will continue ...
>“She will take care of you if you take care of her. She's a very special doll like that.”
-Can’t help, but wonder if Twilight might actually have placed ‘protection wards’ inside the doll ? Probably not, but certainly an interesting idea.
>“Pinkie Pie knows eeeeverything,” Pinkie said, giving Twilight one of her creepier stares.
-Pinky Pie stared at the face of Eternity... the Eternity turned around and started running in the opposite direction.
...And that’s how Equestria was made.
>Twilight let out a chuckle. “A little bird told me.”
>“Who? Owlicious?” Dinky asked, surprised. She took a quick glance at the owl sleeping on its perch.
-Heh. Even if a simple one, that’s actually rather amusing.
When there’s magic, and that half the animals(aka: those who don’t have a civilization) can communicate with you for real... quite a few expressions can become quite literal. ;)
>“She's not my real mom, you know,” Dinky said suddenly, causing Twilight to almost take a lungful of hot chocolate.
-You know... I really don’t get why the author HAD to do that ?
I mean, it really doesn’t add anything to the story, or the situation in general (I can *very* easily remove the ‘’adopted’’ mention, without altering anything significant)... it just needlessly distance us, by applying ‘’artificial’’ (even if minor) distance between Dinky and Derpy.
Most people and stories display them as biologically linked, anyway. Which is perfectly fine.
>she noticed the dandelions. They had gone more than a little droopy
-Owww... no ‘yellow to white fluffy dandelions’’ symbolism ?
>Twilight gave one last glance at the mailmare and her daughter and couldn't help but smile.
-They do make the best family.
-----
Well, first I will clear something right away... I DON’T have anything against adoption, but I simply don’t think it served any vital purpose here, plus the fact it is widely said-and-believed that Dinky was ‘born’ from Derpy/Ditzy, in stories or through general discussions. (Genetics allows this to be perfectly possible. Just saying.)
Not that ‘this’ is out of the way...
I ‘MUST’ say that this was one of, if not THE story that most successfully achieved a level of ‘’realism’’ and ‘’believability’’ in how characters behaved and reacted to the events happening/or that had happened... ‘’physically’’ or emotionally. (That I have read so far. I read a LOT of stories. A lot...)
@Nova25
VastaKustuta*NOW that ‘this’ is out of the way...
(correction)
@Nova25
VastaKustuta*that marks the end ''of her coma''
(I could swear I had modified that before posting... oh well. This the last one.)
@Melodia
VastaKustutaI like this story allot as well but i fine Melodia was right, you should have let Dinky be her real daughter since they made it canon in the episode Baby Cakes instead of being adopted. But then you would have to write how she had Dinky for her not have a father to add to the Sad tag. If it was from a time when she was vulnerable and a stallion took advantage of her, a one night stand, a rape attack that she was hiding from the world, or that Dinky father died when she was very young, or that a tabooed act brought her into the world (e.g Dinky's father is also Derpy's father: AKA incest).
But then that may not be what you were trying to write or pointing to. So all together i love the story and the end was sweet that she cared that much for her muffin to put her own safety on the back burn for her.
@Uther
VastaKustuta>If it was from a time when she was vulnerable and a stallion took advantage of her >a rape attack
-What an horrible thing to even think, seriously ? (and I not even going to talk about the suggestion of 'incest' (What's wrong with you?))
But anyway...
The author could have explained easily, and without the need for a huge backstory, the ''missing father'' thing (leaving it more-or-less open)... while still making it somewhat sad, and without ''unnecessarly disturbing'' stuff.
Anything from : 'Travelling(marchant, maybe?)/Explorer/Diplomat/Something making him leave home for extended periods of time', and one day he doesn't come home, and she never found out why (leave open possibilities)... to ... 'Something like a monster/thugs/weather-natural disaster claimed his life, after he saved/protected/defended her'... and etc...
You know, ''bittersweet''/good 'sad' things.
FiMFiction
VastaKustutahttp://www.fimfiction.net/story/50474/postal-blues-and-grey-feathers
*SPOILER*
VastaKustutaSo does Derpy in this have a hereditary problem that she'll eventually die from, or was it the tons of overworking that cause her mishap? If it's the latter then I'm happy...
*SPOILER*
VastaKustutaSo does Derpy in this have a hereditary problem that she'll eventually die from, or was it the tons of overworking that cause her mishap? If it's the latter then I'm happy...