• Story: Spookshow Baby

    [Shipping] This one is a bit more mature than normal.  It's not a borderline clopfic, but it does cover more adult themes. 

    Author: SoundofRainfall
    Description: As Halloween nears, Twilight Sparkle goes against her normal routine of studying and instead decides to try her hoof at a night on the town in Manehattan. She runs into Trixie in the most unlikely of places, and the two have an interesting reunion...
    Spookshow Baby

    Additional Tags: Awkward, One-shot, 'Culture', Manehattan

    67 comments:

    1. Wow, borderline clopfic. That's cutting it close, Seth

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    2. This not only sounds like a ship fic, but a comedy as well.

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    3. @WizardShy firsting on a fanfic is just low.....

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    4. Derp. not a borderline clopfic. Didnt see that there......

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    5. @Bombedrumbum But it was an accident, didn't you see that I said "not first"?






      Element of Honesty kicking in, yeah, it's low. I'm very low. I haven't slept in 37 hours. Goodnight.

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    6. @WizardShy that's your way of getting around it if you fail to get first post. Its the Same. Exact. Thing.

      You've done it many times before, so I know that it is no accident

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    7. I think seth knows that saying its mature is inviting all of the immature children to come read it...

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    8. I'll read this once i finish this other ship i have open.

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    9. Reminder: Fallout Equestria 20.5 is also labelled "borderline clopfic" despite, ya know, like 10 pages of cunnilingus and double sided dildo action. :\

      I guess the lesson is, clopfics are allowed on EQD so long as they're substantive and mature instead of HUR DUR HAVE SUM PR0N

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    10. Woah. . .

      The banner isn't completely different, but has changed. Rarity's hair isn't curly.

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    11. Well all this commentary is well and good, but i see nothing stating why this is rated 3.3 (at the time of writing). Anypony have any answers?

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    12. TWI WANDERS INTO A STRIP CLUB AND SEES TRIXIE'S BROKE ASS POLE DANCING ONSTAGE? THAT'S THE PREMISE?

      XD

      WHY DOES THIS NOT HAVE A COMEDY TAG?

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    13. @mycutiemarkisagun

      I'm not familiar with any such Fo:E chapter, at least not on EqD.

      You sure that wasn't posted somewhere else?

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    14. Loved it. Personaly think it deserves a 'Comedy' tag but that's just me.

      Also any plans for a sequel. It would be a great read.

      5/5

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    15. @Daffodil

      It's lower in the reading section, but it's still part of the canon storyline. I believe it's labeled something like "A Mare Worth Fighting For"

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    16. Uh oh... Woah boy. I don't like the sound of this. Will read.

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    17. She's a killer!
      She's a thriller!
      Spookshow baby!
      She's a killer!
      She's a thriller!
      Yeah Spookshow baby!

      I can't be the only one who thought Rob Zombie when I saw the title of the song, can I?

      I'll read this simply because of the title name.

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    18. Well, that was... interesting. Definitely not cloppy (...why are you looking at me like that?), but there is a rather generous amount of sauce. Not bad, but not exactly awe-inspiring.

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    19. @mycutiemarkisagun This story isn't substantive and mature, though. It's rather pointless, the interpretation of show characters was clumsy, the premise is just stupid, what passes for shipping is just crude, very spontaneous lust that's neither believable nor appealing, and the tone is too far from that of the actual source material. This basically just seems to be a case of the 'author' (I feel uncomfortable even applying that term) wanting to write a story glorifying pole dancing, deciding at some point to include ponies with a pairing that, for no good reason, has a large group of supporters in a transparent attempt to gain more readers. Except that even here the author fails, since this story doesn't really do much one way or another to glorify pole dancing, since, despite his best efforts at portraying a scene involving it, Trixie's explanation for and defense of it is uninteresting and hollow--not to mention that Trixie makes a lousy spokesperson for anything besides the concept of failure.

      I never thought I'd actually find a story that makes Butterscotchsundae's works look halfway tolerable, but the day has come. This story is a joke, either by the author or by Sethisto for actually allowing it to stain ED, but either way, it's sure not a funny one.

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    20. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    21. It was alright, feels like it should be a multi-part though.

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    22. @mycutiemarkisagun

      Oh my God I laughed so hard at this, thank you for that

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    23. @mycutiemarkisagun

      Thank you! that's how you peak interest people!

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    24. @60a5ee04-083a-11e1-93af-000f20980440 There are nicer ways of saying things, but if that's the only way you could express your feelings for the story, then so be it. It was still rather rude going to the point of saying that you find it difficult to use the word, "author," when speaking of this fic's author.

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    25. @OmegaPony11

      That is exactly what I was thinking too. Cool to see another Rob Zombie fan.

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    26. That was...interesting?

      I don't know, this is just one of those crazy premises that are way too farfetched to work out. Twilight had to be completely out of character for it to work, which is unacceptable. And the writing style didn't do much to grab me--some variation in sentence structure and paragraph length would have gone a long way towards rectifying that. The author really favors long, winding sentences when a short, punchy, Hemmingway-esque sentence may have had more impact.

      I don't have an issue with mature content as long as it still feels like a situation that the characters may actually find themselves in. This fic is not one of those situations. It probably would have worked better as something original, not in the MLP universe. As a fanfic for MLP, it simply doesn't hold up well.

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    27. @Sethisto

      C'mon Seth. This is a clopfic... It doesn't have to have actual sex to be a clopfic.

      At least in my mind.

      Let me put it this way, if people would clop to it, its a clopfic.

      This story is a work of "erotic fiction"... at best.

      At worst, its a strange attempt to have Trixie pole dance for Twilight.

      That being said, yes it does seem like a multi part.

      But I don't know how there could be a part two without it having someone horrifyingly explicit.

      Basically, its a clopfic, and I had to skip a paragraph or two to keep my sanity.

      (Luna Vs Threesome scarred me enough yesterday)

      Forgive me if it sounds strange, but ponies pole dancing and having sex does not appeal to me.

      If I wanted either of those things, I'd watch True Blood.

      I watch MLP to be a kid again, not think about animal sex...

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    28. @60a5ee04-083a-11e1-93af-000f20980440

      lol, i meant to put "mature" in scare quotes.

      "tone is too far from that of the actual source material" ehhhh, this applies to all grimdark in theory tho

      "glorify pole dancing" ...ain't nothin wrong with pole dancing bruh....

      Premise is still hilarious imho. Trixie being forced into degrading work after Ponyville is always funny to me. (remember: Kkat had her turning tricks on the turnpike) Twilight's adorkable enough to wander into a strip club.

      IMHO the stupidest thing about the story is it abruptly climaxing with Twilight acting in a idiotic fashion that would get any actual titty bar patron tasered, curb-stomped by bouncers, and dumped in a pissy alley.

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    29. @The Commander

      Good grief, grow up. What are you, fifteen? Amish? It's culturally accepted to be the mark of an adult mind that something of this level isn't going to send you into any sort of emotional disturbance or shaking under your covers. If you don't like mature themes, why did you read the warning/disclaimer and read it anyway?

      As for 60a up there... if you can't critique directly and at least decently, don't do it at all. It honestly sounds like you're just insulting two authors to a mob as if trying to get them to agree with your boorish point of view. We need a few less people like you in that regard.

      In any case, it was an enjoyable way to spend a bit of time while I await updates on my followed fics, hooves up for the author.

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    30. I actually thought this was an entertaining read, a quirky little one-shot that isn't meant to be taken too seriously. The ending felt a little bit rushed; and shoot me but overall I thought that the Great and Powerful Trixie's attitude about her new "career" was suitable-given the fact that she always just wanted so much attention.

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    31. @Kayriel

      19 and Catholic, actually.

      Maybe I wasn't clear enough. I do watch True Blood. I'm not terrified of the concept of somebody doing a poledance.

      However, Rose McGowan poledancing in Planet Terror and Trixie poledancing are two radically different things!

      Excuse me for not wanting to think about ponies in a sexual context!

      Don't persecute me for it!

      I read it because I thought "This is EQD, how bad could it be?"

      Hey, that rhymed!

      Honestly, I wouldn't mind it if it was done in a more comedy context, but I just found the extreme pleasure that the author seemed to take in Trixie poledancing and the detail it was written in to be suitable for it to be labeled as a "clopfic".

      Honestly, until the poledancing scene actually started, it thought this story was pretty funny. I was still taking it as a joke. I didn't need the graphic images of Trixie dancing.

      Again, please don't persecute me for this, I'm just stating a point of view.

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    32. @The Commander

      No one's "persecuting" anyone.

      I'm just in awe that someone who is so upset by the idea of ponies in sexual situations read a story like this. You were warned. Quite explicitly. You admit to reading that warning, and ultimately chose to ignore it.

      I have no sympathy for you or, as you melodramatically put it, your "sanity".

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    33. @BlueStraggler

      My thoughts exactly. Just a harmless, entertaining read, and I agree, Trixie ended up getting exactly what she wanted: adoration and attention.

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    34. A fair read for the early morning. Ending felt a bit rushed, but that might have been a redeeming quality.

      The warning that it was at least something borderline sexual in nature was clear, so Mr. Commander's got not excuse.

      Also, I don't think Twi was all that OOC; late night and loud music gets to some ponies - and she definitely strikes me as one of those.

      I did actually read the Trixie lines in Rarity's voice, which may be the sign of a deeper issue I have with that particular character. To be honest, the cannon character development on Trixie lasts about as long as this fic's ending, so I'd say Trixie here is at least remotely in character from what little data I have.

      I think 3/5 is a solid rating for this. I just wish blogger didn't jump from 'Didn't like it' to 'Liked it'; it desperately needs a 'meh. okay.' option.

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    35. Thi story actually felt between decent and good for me...

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    36. @The Commander

      Realize that there are people clopping to things like 'Bubbles' and 'Transcendence', and other non-shipping works. You could argue that case for anything (sadly).

      This is nothing as bad/good as Fallout: Equestria's half chapter.

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    37. @mycutiemarkisagun
      ten whole pages!? Wow, that's a lot of clop isn't it...especially for a site that doesn't usually allow clop.

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    38. I'm definitely with the crowd that thinks this could do to have a comedy tag, if for no other reason, situational humor. Simply picturing Twi throughout the entirety of the story had me just about giggling to the end. "You'll see some culture, alright."

      I enjoyed this very much. It could be left open for more, but I think it stands very well on its own. It has every star I can give it.

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    39. @Flutterfan

      well i was being hyperboleliscious but yeah, it is NOT f'n borderline. Its got a moment at the end so poignant the thing has basically become canon, but it is most def clop.

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    40. Hey I've read this on Fanfiction.net! Glad it got a feature on EqD. I wonder if the unofficial sequel will make it as well.

      http://www.fimfiction.net/story/1749/Spookshow-Baby-II

      I thought it was pretty good.

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    41. @mycutiemarkisagun
      Strip club.
      Strip club?
      "Beg pardon, Rarity, but, uh... we don't normally wear clothes."

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    42. @EHeroFlareNeos

      Make that a third, it's not my favorite song of his, but I did think of it.

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    43. @Jango-FettThere is a sequel just by another author.

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    44. Ok let's admit that Twilight needs to get it out of her system and tap that. The suspense is killiing everyone. Just get together so we can all get on with our lives.

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    45. As a critic and a fan of Twixie, this was amazing. The comedy is brilliant, and the shipping is done well. *brohoof*

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    46. Eh...I don't really understand how stripping would exist in Equestria. Still, it was entertaining in a situational humour sort of way. Needs a comedy tag.

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    47. @mycutiemarkisagun

      I'll believe that when Romance Reports gets posted here.

      I still haven't read FO:E but as far as I understand it, it's the difference between a hollywood sex scene and a porno: as long as the cloppy descriptions remain generalized or vague without detailed anatomy it's allowed.

      For instance, if the only description is what the participants are experiencing emotionally and the pleasure they are feeling and thoughts in their heads it's ok.

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    48. This was... Different.

      Never was a Twixie fan but I guess this was well written.

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    49. Anyway. This story was hilarious. Almost as good as Friendly Uncle's racy stuff.

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    50. Whatever. I'm not gonna debate the semantics of pony sexuality.

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    51. It was pretty short so I read the whole thing, and I gotta say it was awkward to read. It's the first "Mature" pony story I've read, and I don't think I'll continue to read them. It's not like this story was bad, but I just can't seam to find a stripper pony sexy and not weird.

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    52. It was definitely awkward to read, like how Twilight felt being there awkward. Otherwise it was a nice story that was pretty provocative. I grew into it and found the night life theme interesting. Reminds me of some of my friends who live in that sort of dirty lifestyle (not that there's anything wrong with it). It just touched home on that for me. Well written too.

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    53. Wasn't expecting it to be longer than a one-shot, but I'm definitely looking forward to it. :)

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    54. Spookshow Baby II is by a different author.

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    55. I am fairly certain that it's written by the same author despite different names. The writing and storytelling is the same, not to mention he provides a link to the first one.
      In any case, I was a bit fearful for Twilight when she was losing it. It gave the same dark and smokey atmosphere as the first story, I like that about it. And it's nice to see closure on her feelings of the whole ordeal. I really enjoyed the story.

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    56. @Ragneki5880
      Nope, the two have completely different Fanfiction.net accounts.

      http://www.fanfiction.net/u/3116129/SoundofRainfall

      http://www.fanfiction.net/~joshthemeowth

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    57. Ok, ya got me! I could practically see all of this take place as I was reading it. In a way this could be a follow up story to "Blue Like Sapphires", another great Trixie based story (and one I probably need to leave a comment on as well). Really the only bad thing that could be said about this story is that it's kinda short, but that's about it. I'd very much like to know if a follow up story is going to be written about Twilight and Trixie's meeting sometime after there meeting at The Spiked Crop. Personally I'd love to see how Twilight and Trixie would interact with each other and how Twilight would come to terms with what took place at The Spiked Crop. I very much did enjoy this story and I would love it if another story follwed it.

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