• Story: My Little Airship (Update Part 5!)

    [Adventure] [Sci-Fi]

    Author: Firmly_Grasp_It
    Description: It's Canterlot's fabricated Beastie's versus Trottingham's steam-powered Clankers. Twilight Sparkle is a Princess without a throne. On the run from her own country, she has only a fighting machine and a small band of soldiers by her side. Applejack is an aspiring pilot in Canterlot's Royal Air Force. Being a mare, she must fight for her cause and fight off
    the prejudice of her peers at all cost. They are enemies with everything to lose, yet somehow their paths were destined to cross.

    Inspired by Scott Westerfeld's "Leviathan".
    Google Docs
    My Little Airship Part 1
    My Little Airship Part 2
    My Little Airship Part 3
    My Little Airship Part 4
    My Little Airship Part 5 (New!)


    Deviant Art
    My Little Airship Part 1
    My Little Airship Part 2
    My Little Airship Part 3
    My Little Airship Part 4
    My Little Airship Part 5 (New!)

    itional Tags: Steampunk, Airships, World War 1, Alt-History, Steampower

    50 kommentaari:

    1. A LEVIATHAN CROSSOVER!?!?!?! ALL MY MONEY, TAKE IT! MUST READ!

      VastaKustuta
    2. Now THIS sounds interesting, I haven't read a steampunk story yet. I hope the author is capable of doing this idea justice.

      VastaKustuta
    3. Never really got into the whole steampunk idea. Not sure where it came from or what its all about, but I'll admit, it does look cool.

      As for "Leviathan", im not sure, is that a book or something? Sounds like i might nned read that before this....

      VastaKustuta
    4. Read it so far, awaiting the next part... a bit of a cliffhanger.

      VastaKustuta
    5. additional tag World War 1?!? sounds different
      *reads later*

      VastaKustuta
    6. Leviathan is an amazing book. Everyone needs to go read it RIGHT NOW.

      VastaKustuta
    7. Oooh... anything that seems to have Steampunk-eaque items and subjects gets my interest. Though I've never read "Leviathan", this certainly sounds like a really interesting story I could get into.

      VastaKustuta
    8. Ya a Leviathan crossover, I knew with the recent steam punk thing it would happen

      VastaKustuta
    9. I agree with joetraincool... ALL MY MONEY

      VastaKustuta
    10. This is amazing! Only thing as good as Fallout;Equestria I can find out on the webs.

      VastaKustuta
    11. Leviathan is an awesome book.
      FiM is an awesome show.
      Therefore, this will be an awesome fic.

      VastaKustuta
    12. Okay, I don't believe this Crossover could've been any better. I'm definitely waiting for more

      VastaKustuta
    13. Mother of CELESTIA!!! Take my money and do NOTHING but, FINISH THIS!!!!!!!!!

      VastaKustuta
    14. If you guys like fanfic I recommend Cold in Gardez and Friendly Uncle, they're still the best I've read. Cold in Gardez's Cutie Mark Crusader story was absolutely hilarious, and Fluffershy is perhaps the funniest story every written, pony or no pony.

      VastaKustuta
    15. YOU CROSSED PONIES AND LEVIATHON
      THE EPIC LEVEL IS OFF THE CHARTS!!!

      VastaKustuta
    16. Thanks commenters, now I have "Leviathan" on a new list of books I need to buy. I've never read steampunk before, and I'll be looking forward to reading it.

      VastaKustuta
    17. Autor on selle kommentaari eemaldanud.

      VastaKustuta
    18. Hell yeah, a steampunk ponyfic. I knew it was only a matter of time, given all the excellent steampunk pony artwork out there. And a crossover with Leviathan, no less? In the immortal words of Rainbow Dash: "So. Awesome!"

      @Octavia

      If you're a steampunk fan and you haven't read Leviathan, you're missing out; next to Girl Genius, it's the best piece of steampunk fiction I've ever read. The trilogy just finished up, too, so you can knock them all out in one go if you're so inclined.

      VastaKustuta
    19. I say, While this is well-written and all, I feel like it pulls too much from Leviathan. I've read the book and thought it was great, and I commend the author for liking it too, but I just think it's a little too unoriginal. :/
      other than that, I'm really glad there are those of us who enjoy steampunk too. /)^3^(\ It's a small world after all!

      VastaKustuta
    20. `AppleTank
      O_0 Holy shit. And i just finished the trilogy too.

      Wait, would this mean Twilight x AJ?
      Bigger O_0

      VastaKustuta
    21. Steampunk! Honestly, has there been any other steampunk ponyfic? will 100% read

      VastaKustuta
    22. Augh cliffhanger. You MONSTER.

      Yeah, I'll give 'er a chance. Seems pretty solid so far (I -did- notice a few gramatical foibles, though; you do not pluralies pony "pony's") but it was overall well written enough that I'm more than willing to overlook it, grammar nazi though I may be. I approve.

      VastaKustuta
    23. Shouldn't this have the cross-over tag?
      Very good, I'm a fan of Leviathan and this mirrors it extremely well. My only complaint would be that Trottingham (ie Nottingham) is British. Even in Equestria, a trottingham native (Pipsqueak)has a British accent. Maybe Coltenhagen as the Clanker capitol?

      VastaKustuta
    24. Praise Celestia! FINALLY a story on google docs. I can't wait to read this.

      VastaKustuta
    25. OK, so after getting a chance to actually sit down and read this, I have to agree with EnigmaMTC. Strongly. This might be because you've only got one chapter up so far, but this doesn't read like a crossover fic so much as it does like Leviathan with all the names changed.

      Your key problem that I'm seeing is that you haven't maintained Dash's and Twilight's personalities, which is an absolutely essential element of this crossover style. Instead, they're basically just Alek and Volger in Twilight's and Dash's bodies.

      My other problem is that I just keep asking myself "why?" and the only answer I come up with is "because that's how it was in Leviathan." Example: why does Twi have a hunting knife under her pillow? Wouldn't her, say, prepping a flashbang spell make more sense?

      I also would've swapped up some of your casting choices, and I think you missed a great opportunity to throw some racial tension in the mix to make things more interesting. Honestly, I have a lot of ideas about how I think this could work better, but you're the author, not me. If you're interested, though, PM me on deviantART and we'll talk.

      VastaKustuta
    26. Hey, Author here.

      Wow, 5 stars?! I expected maybe 4 at the most, but WOW! I'm really glad to see that alot of people here actually read the book, too. I was tempted to crossover something like Boneshaker (with Ditzy and Dinky), but I figured that Leviathan characters tied together with MLP better. As always, constructive criticism is welcome and encouraged.

      The concerns about Twilight and Rainbow Dash's personalities will be addressed. I figured since the first chapter had such a sense of urgency, I could stick their character development on the backburner until the next chapter.

      Warning: I'm a very slow writer, and I will not be totally faithful to the Leviathan story. Hope you stick around for future chapters!

      VastaKustuta
    27. This seemed interesting, until I got my hands on Leviathan. It's simply exactly the same. You replaced some names, and made tiny changes to some situations, but overall, there's barely anything original in there :-\

      VastaKustuta
    28. @Sethisto I can understand how it could come off as a shameless mirror at first, but keep in mind that it's only been one chapter. I'll be drastically deviating from the book's story soon, and it won't come off as a mirror when its finished.

      Also, others who've read the Leviathan trilogy don't seem to have a problem with me sticking to the script so far, and those who haven't read it appear to just enjoy it as another decent adventure story.

      VastaKustuta
    29. Still hews to closely to the original...

      VastaKustuta
    30. I never read Leviathan butthis is good... Could become something great

      VastaKustuta
    31. I haven't read the source material, but there was one point in chapter two were the conversion got weird. Macintosh points out that Applejack's marehood hadn't developed yet. I don't feel like explaining why that's a little off, but it's kinda jarring.

      VastaKustuta
    32. This is a good story and an interesting setting, its just a shame that neither of them are yours as this is just a slight rewriting of "Leviathan" by Scott Westerfeld without any attempt to actually combine the settings beyond a mostly cosmetic change from humans to Ponies. I am giving it one star for the time bieng but if you can manage to get off the rails of Mr Westerfeld's story and make something original rather than just putting someone else's work in Pony-drag.

      @Solar Phoenix: That is an example of how it is so far nothing but Leviathan in Pony-drag rather than an actual crossover. That conversation is lifted more or less word for word from one Leviathan about how Deryn (the Leviathan female lead who AJ has been cast as) hasn't developed much in the way of a bust yet, which is an example of why I am calling it Pony-drag rather than a crossover as Ponies don't have breasts and the main visual gender characteristic is the shape of their head which is apparent even in young fillies and colts making that conversation and the whole situation nonsensical (seriously, what is she going to do, wear a mask the whole time?).

      @Firmly_Grasp_It: If you really are going to go beyond the current near word for word rip off of Leviathan I would seriously suggest doing a total rewrite of the current chapters because that is all they which makes a really bad first impression.

      VastaKustuta
    33. From what I'm getting, it's already deviated massively from the original because everyone knows Applejack is a mare: "may I present mah sister Applejack.". Last time I checked, the secrecy of her gender was the main cause of conflict betwixt Deryn and everyone else.

      But yea, get rid of the part where they talk about how her "diddlies" haven't come in yet, and make the story fit ponies better in general...

      VastaKustuta
    34. @Cthulhu Inc
      Ah, I had missed that AJ being a mare was common knowledge. I think the fact that I have read Leviathan several times and the considerable portions of near word for word text are leading me to read it with less care than I should, I will have to be more careful. Thank you for pointing out my error.

      VastaKustuta
    35. ERROR! Permissions are set wrong on part 3. I can't get to it... and I want to! ;)

      VastaKustuta
    36. Damn good read... Was going to read Leviathan but I dont want to spoil this... Odd I think its supposed to be the other way arround

      VastaKustuta
    37. @Firmly_Grasp_It
      That comment was me, actually, but it seems all comments on that other comments system that was temporarily implemented got reposted using Sethisto's account

      VastaKustuta
    38. err...is there another big mackintosh or am i wrongfully tagged here o_0?

      VastaKustuta
    39. @Big mackintoshyeah, I have no idea why Seth tagged you. I'll let him know.

      VastaKustuta
    40. looking forward to the next bit :)

      VastaKustuta
    41. I finally got to reading the 1st chapter and I'm a bit confused. Are the characters in here ponies, humans, or anthros?

      VastaKustuta
    42. There ponies i guess. Liked this story so far, might give Leviathan a chance when i find them in the libary.^^

      VastaKustuta
    43. When I first read it, I was amazed at quality and story. Then i read Leviathn...its exactly the same thing, only names were changed and some words were ponyfied.

      VastaKustuta
    44. I'm thinking of it should be the Solar Empires Beasties versus the Lunar Republics Clankers. owo Just a thought.

      VastaKustuta