• Story: Painless

    [Sad]

    Author: Anonthony
    Description: After Pinkie's psychotic break, she struggles to cope with her fractured consciousness as it tries to drive her into a downward spiral.
    Painless

    Additional Tags: "Serious" "Emotional" "Psychological" "Pinkamena" "One-off story"

    57 comments:

    1. there is way too much sad pinkie, why cant i just hug her and make all the bad stuff go away?

      ReplyDelete
    2. The Element of Laughter, everypony.

      ReplyDelete
    3. This is getting a little ridiculous...but i'll read it.

      ReplyDelete
    4. I'm glad to see this one get posted. This is a great story that really speaks from the depths of despair. It reminds you of the dark times we've all had to face, and that it's okay to ask for help.

      Five stars sir. I'm looking forward to what more you have to write.

      ReplyDelete
    5. this story i feel will make me feel better

      ReplyDelete
    6. Had some of the most dynamic dialogue I've seen in a sad fic. I'm expecting an explanation for those voices, though.

      ReplyDelete
    7. Like some of the others, I've been getting a bit sick of Depressed!Pinkie Pie as well, but I decided I'd give this a try. I am so happy I did.
      This is quite possibly one of the best sad -- no, one of the best pony stories in a whole I've read.

      I loved every bit of it, and I am left wanting more from you, Anonthony.



      Now I need to go hug something.

      ReplyDelete
    8. This was really good. I must say, though, I expected the big damn heroes moment quite a bit sooner, but the scroll bar kept saying I was barely anywhere, and of that I approve. I don't usually read sad fics, but I just finished Catch-22, and I kinda wanted to feel sad. Nice job

      ReplyDelete
    9. Best fucking thing I've read in forever

      ReplyDelete
    10. A Rush and Coheed fan, hell yeah. Now to read past the table of contents and see if you can write.

      ReplyDelete
    11. I very much approve, ya big ol' writing pony - good job, I'll definately say that was a really well written piece, and a very good first fic.
      Four stars, well deserved - may we see more of your name in future, you could be another great one to keep track of! :3

      ReplyDelete
    12. gee....that pic, thats gota be the sadest pinkie i've ever seen. i'll bookmark this and give it read sometime. ill rate later if i like it.

      ReplyDelete
    13. Really good. Thats all I have to say.

      ReplyDelete
    14. i cant help but argue the fact the elements of harmony wouldnt choose a pony with psychological problem

      ReplyDelete
    15. >"Serious" "Emotional" "Psychological" "Pinkamena"

      -Bleh... the whole ''psychological Pinky Pie'' is starting to smell like old warmed food...

      ReplyDelete
    16. Did I just see "the elements of discord"? in twilights letter? is this a sign? celestia must be Wondering...

      ReplyDelete
    17. Woah. That was like, one of the best portrayals of depression I've read in a while, both online and in dead tree format. It feels exactly like that on the bad days.

      Five-star for actual emotional intensity.

      ReplyDelete
    18. Oh and I rate this 5/5 Great job, I even put music fitting to this story..FRIENSHIP IS MAGIC!

      ReplyDelete
    19. it was pretty spot on. don't forget the pain, though. that sharp, electric pain through your chest as each word is said. worthless burden, useless waste. each one eating away at you, leaving that aching trail of hurt.

      sorry. a bit of a cop-out, having it be some evil spirit though. i would have loved to see a Pinkie Pie dealing with true depression rather than magically ... magical magic'd depression. i can see why you'd chose that way but still ...

      ReplyDelete
    20. I couldn't agree more even if I tried. This was a truly beautiful thing to read. I can always handle a sad or grimdark fic as long as everything is right in the end. Anonthony, thank you for making my week. I can't express how much better I feel now; even if it was sad, the ending is truly satisfying.

      I can't wait for you to write more!

      ReplyDelete
    21. While I am indeed tired of sad Pinkie, I did get around to reading this. Holy crap man...just...5/5 stars. That is all.

      ReplyDelete
    22. I can completely sympathize with the Pinkie Pie represented in this story. The way it all unfolds is depression itself put into words better than I thought possible.

      ReplyDelete
    23. This story was a blast to read. Psychological dysfunctions have always been an interest of mine.

      Plus I had fun reading the voices in different tones, especially the angry one. VERY VERY well written story.

      ReplyDelete
    24. Bravo, this is one of the better stories I've read. The way Pinkie's deepening depresion was writen, I don't think I know a word to properly desribe how well it was done. 5/5

      ReplyDelete
    25. A truthful read indeed.
      Mental wounds do make one stronger and self pity is a dangerous thing.

      ReplyDelete
    26. I think I need to reread 'The Party Hasn't Ended' a few times to recover from that one. OUCH.

      As far as delving into Pinkie's mind and what might be in there, it's inevitable. So happy on the outside, plus watching her fall apart, means it's inevitable that it'll be on someone's mind.

      Honestly, I'm a little surprised at what it wasn't, the source of the voices.

      ReplyDelete
    27. Really disappointed in this story based on all the glowing praise it's getting in the comments. Psychologically disturbed Pinkie Pie is one of my favorite character themes, but this isn't a depiction of that at all. I didn't feel the personality of any of the cast coming through in their dialogue, and Pinkie Pie might as well have been a random character with unfounded multiple personality disorder.

      The first half of the story is basically a repetitive reiteration of the same thoughts and concepts pounded into text over and over again, and I didn't feel any impact from the re-use of the same cliche dialogue choices. The writing is technically competent, but it fails to accurately convey any part of Pinkie's crumbling sanity with great effect - I didn't feel any empathy as her situation went on, only like I was watching from afar with no concern.

      Wish I saw what everyone else was getting out of this story, wanted to enjoy it, but it's just not doing it for me.

      ReplyDelete
    28. screw this dimension!! Im going to find out how to get to equestria to hug and love all the shit out of her! EVEN IF IT KILLS ME!!! WHOS WITH ME!!!???

      ReplyDelete
    29. Nice story, something to reflect upon. The delve into a broken mind is indeed fascinating, and I appreciated the back-and-forth between Pinkie and the voices. 4/5 stars, good job.

      @Axisof3vil
      You have my bow!

      ReplyDelete
    30. Wow. Just... Wow. That's a painfully realistic depiction of depression.

      ReplyDelete
    31. I'm so glad it had a happy ending, albeit bittersweet. I empathise with Pinkie too much. It would have been crushing to read a tragic ending.
      I thought, at first, the development of her depression being a malevolent spirit a cop out. But then I saw it as metephorical. The power of sadness and self pity destroys self worth, and the power of friendship literally quashed it and healed her. In real life, there is no literal evil spirit, but it feels like it sometimes. It's relatable, with a twist thanks to the in universe existance of magic. Too relatable.
      This was a good fic, but I'm gonna stop reading sad fics. They bring up too many memories.

      ReplyDelete
    32. I've never suffered depression. Not even close. I have no idea what's it like. At the risk of offending someone who has gone through it, it did seem like a realistic portrayal of it.

      The ending leaves me wanting a bit though. There is some sense of closure with Pinkie herself, but not with her friends. Nor her bond with her friends. Nothing is said about her parents, or her bond with them. And whatever being was tormenting her... If you go that way, it is a bit annoying there is no explanation. Especially since you yourself hint at it that its not defeated and will be back.

      Of course, you can look at it metaphorically. As a representation of depression, and I'm sure that someone who has suffered from it always has to be on guard. It can always return. In a way, it also makes sense that it speaks to the others in that sense. I'm sure that people around someone who is suffering from depression also doubt themselves. Can they do more to help? Should they have seen it coming? Could they have prevented it? Even more so when someone hurts themselves... Or worse.

      Still, its a bit unsatisfying it doesn't get explained. All in all though, its was a gripping story. I'm not the biggest fan of this kind of sad, but of course I had to sit through it after I started.

      ReplyDelete
    33. I've read a lot of these Pinkamena character examination stories, and I have to say that this one is by a wide margin the most intense and gripping one I've read. Only The Party Never Ended can match it, I think, and even that is arguably just because it didn't cover quite the same ground as this one.


      In particular, I really, really liked how you had Pinkie explore her inner feelings and turmoil without even a hint of Cupcakes-style thoughts crossing her mind (I like Party so much for the same reason). As fun as that interpretation is to joke around with, it doesn't seem remotely true to life to pretend Pinkie would actually come close to thinking thoughts like that (even subconsciously); so portraying her as thinking she herself is to blame and responding accordingly rather than lashing out at others works far better in my mind than the opposite.






      I will admit that not following up on what the voices were kind of rubbed me the wrong way, but I honestly wasn't sure whether I was supposed to take them as a metaphor or if I was supposed to assume it was a magic being similar to what corrupted Luna (which is what happened in Party); and in either case the story seems to imply that the Mane Six will be all right now that they know it is out there so I suppose I can let it slide.

      ReplyDelete
    34. This was quite in depth... Loved it.

      Those voices will need to be explained in a later story though. I'm not gonna let you get away with letting go of something that said that "It's not over". :)

      ReplyDelete
    35. 9/10 would pony again. This is the first semi-lengthy [Sad] fic I've read, and I am marginally impressed. Well done. There are some ends that could be tied up, but I have to ask (hopefully without spoiling anything):

      to the people wondering about the voices: have you never read Elements of Discord?

      ReplyDelete
    36. Was very good, I was incredibly disappointed with the Dues Ex Machina end of Twilight's spell, but I was incredibly hooked with the build up before Pinkie's suicide attempt.
      4/5.

      ReplyDelete
    37. @WizardWannabe
      @Rainy Days
      @Baree
      @TenchiFreak5
      @Minalkra
      And others:

      First I want to thank everyone for their reviews and ratings so far. I truly appreciate it. To be honest, this was written in about 3-4 days with little edit/review, as it seemed to all come to me at once, and to see that most people enjoyed it is very gratifying.

      Spoilers:
      And yes, much of the identity of the Voices is meant to be taken metaphorically for the darkness inherent in each of us; and the Deus Ex Machina of a 'spell' breaking the 'curse' is metaphorically the power and necessity of a support system and love to help conquer it.

      I knew going in that there would be some loose ends - how things progressed after the events, delving deeper into the nature of the Voices (I personally have not read Elements of Discord myself, nor had I read any of the Season 2 information that ironically seemed to have some foreshadowing of something like this), and so on. Perhaps given the positive feedback there will need to be a follow up and perhaps some alternate endings.

      Thanks, and spread it around. ;)

      ReplyDelete
    38. wheeeww that took a while to read but it was sure worth it. very well written and emotional. 5/5

      ReplyDelete
    39. After reading stuff like this I have to go back and watch an actual episode to remind myself that Pinkie Pie is a ball of energized excitement and not actually descending into depression or madness. Its sort of weird how it effects my brain.

      ReplyDelete
    40. After reading this, I think I understand how bad schizophrenia is.

      OHGODTHEPAIN

      ReplyDelete
    41. I read this today during a slow bit at work and I've been thinking about it the entire day so far. It's really, really well done. Besides some grammatical problems, it was a great read. The colored text was fantastic, and I like the idea of a disembodied "force" that's trying to destroy the Elements of Harmony one at a time, slowly and insidiously. It's a fascinating idea. I'd say the story takes a little too long to get going in the beginning, and as others have mentioned, there's some repetitive dialog. Still, though, if you truly wrote this up in only a few days' time, I'm quite impressed.

      ReplyDelete
    42. Someone make an alternate ending where Dash doesn't find Pinkie in time.

      ...No, that's too depressing.

      I have to say, that's the saddest Pinkie Pie I've ever seen.

      ReplyDelete
    43. I was up til 6:15AM reading this. I wonder if Anonthony lost someone (or almost became lost in the same way Pinkie nearly did). The way the author captured the pain in this story makes it impossible to comprehend being able to write otherwise.

      I am very, very impressed!

      ReplyDelete
    44. @banannagram
      That was actually the original ending, and the resulting fallout among the friends. The devastation. The group dynamic being broken. I couldn't bring myself to write it. Not yet, at least. Perhaps I will at some point.

      ReplyDelete
    45. I agree with the other comments, this is pretty accurate description of how this kind of depression works. Great story, 5/5!

      ReplyDelete
    46. @AnonthonyEEEEEEEE

      I implore you to do this.

      ReplyDelete
    47. "perhaps some alternate endings"? Yes, please! Silent Ponyville spoiled me with alternate endings, and now I wish all the stories I love had them - and I definitely love this one!

      Once it became apparent that the voices belonged to a separate entity, I was thinking the voices belonged to the stars that freed Nightmare Moon, but there were four stars, weren't there? It's still a possibility, though, I suppose.

      When you say "there will need to be a follow up", are you talking epilogue or sequel? Because with the whole "ILL BE BACK, LOL" thing, I think a sequel would be far more appropriate. I'd love to read more in this setting.

      ReplyDelete
    48. "...Will it hurt...?"
      "No, my dear...It will be painless."
      Painless, she thought.
      Painless.
      She breathed in the frozen air. She whispered something quietly. An apology? A goodbye?
      She took a single fateful step.

      You win. Best [Sad] story I've read.
      Now to solve the mystery why my brain is trying to remix the Song of Time after reading this.

      ReplyDelete
    49. @Baree Not depression, schizophrenia. Though I agree that it seems like a realistic portrayal.

      ReplyDelete
    50. that was one of the best friggin stories ive eve read in my life
      it was very touching and im sure il remember it for years to come
      you have a great talent sir

      ReplyDelete
    51. That was actually really good. It spoke to me in a lot of ways.

      ReplyDelete
    52. @AnonthonyEEEEEEEE

      Yes. Yes yes yes. Even if you don't make it the official ending or whatever, write the "Dash doesn't make it in time/they don't find her until after she's already dead" ending. Write that so hard.

      Also, I would be very interested in a non-magical explanation as well. I don't know.

      ReplyDelete
    53. @banannagram

      Hmm. Usually, schizophrenia seems to be a condition where you are not aware of your other personality/personalities. This just doesn't seem like it to me, and a bunch of voices in your head telling you you're worthless all the time seems as good an explanation for depression as any. And again, you can look at it metaphorically.

      However, I'm the first to admit I don't know that much about schizophrenia either though.

      ReplyDelete
    54. @Baree
      @banannagram

      Both disorders are still not very well understood, despite many years of research and study.

      Classic schizophrenia does indeed usually imply that the individual is not (always) aware of the other personality(s), and in fact actually "becomes" the other personality(s) themselves. They 'are' the voice(s). However, as far as I understand it, this is not always the case in all cases of schizophrenia, some of which the individual is quite aware of the other "self(s)" and actually engages with them. I'm not an expert, so I can't give a definitive answer. And maybe it's just me, but even in my own inner monologue, it can seem as if it's its own entity speaking, and one's stream-of-consciousness can easily start to feel like an external force. I would imagine someone suffering from a psychotic break could start to feel multiple internal thought streams and begin to identify them as selves of their own. In the story it is, of course, metaphorical, but that would be it's real-life analogue.

      (I'm so glad this has sparked some analysis. :] )

      ReplyDelete