Author: Avery Strange
Description: Luna's finally ready to get back out there into the world of Equestria, ready to see what's become of ponykind in the past thousand years. Except... she's not quite ready to go out on her own, amongst ponies that know only tales of nightmares and betrayal about her, and the one pony she knows personally is a little busy running a kingdom and raising the sun. When the offer for companionship comes from an unlikely place, Luna learns two great lessons. One, the risk to get to know a pony can lead to great rewards. Two, socks make everything better.Luna's Day Out Part 1
Luna's Day Out Part 2
Luna's Day Out Part 3
Additional Tags: Luna Fluttershy socks socks socks
51 kommentaari:
Luna in Socks, eh? Haven't heard from that in a while. I'll give it a read
VastaKustutano first for you!
VastaKustutalove this stroy.
VastaKustutaThis will be the forth 6-star story from the shipping master!
VastaKustutayes, Yes, YES. 5 STARS FOR THE TAGS ALONE(luna, socks, and complete), will bookmark this page for tomorrow though.
VastaKustutalol at the socks socks socks tag.
VastaKustutaLuna. Socks. Win.
VastaKustutaIn the wise words of one purple unicorn "yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes!!!"
VastaKustutaAnyway TO THE READING!
Luckily I already read this on DA and can heartily suggest that anypony who sees "shipping," "Luna," "socks," and "Fluttershy" and thinks they might like it will almost definitely like it. Avery described this as "fluffy," and I agree wholeheartedly, but purely in a complimentary fashion. <3
VastaKustuta@CupcakesNom
VastaKustutaIts not heavy shipping is it?
Socks make for instant bedroom-fun.
VastaKustutaAwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...
VastaKustuta(any and all good fluttershy shipping should have this effect. this happens to be amazing fluttershy shipping)
@Anonymous
VastaKustutaQuite the opposite, actually. Just finished reading it. Very cute, and the shipping was extremely low-key until it got to the end, and still it's hard to get irritated by it.
Good story, my friend. 5 Stars
"His name is Nova and he is the best kitty and he'll have a little silver collar with a bell on it and he'll come to my tea parties and he'll have tons of toys but we'll play with bits of colored string and I'll get him a little blue pillow so he can sleep on my bed and I'll never ever be alone again."
VastaKustutaCan't...stop...laughing...
This is the most amazing portrayal of Luna that I've had the pleasure of reading. Everything about this rang true, with the possible exception of Twilight seeming a bit TOO short and aggressive towards the Princess of the Night.
VastaKustutaI loved this story so much! There aren't enough stars in the sky to rate it!
Avery Strange , nothing more to say.
VastaKustutaFreaky. Was surfing the DA accounts of some authors and as I stumbled upon this I thought "is this on EqD?" Lo and behold, I refresh my EqD page and -poof- it's there! Freaky...
VastaKustutaWhilst I'm not a fan of Lunashy, I still rated 5 stars, but that's because I think it was well done... Especially Trollestia.
I dunno. Twilight was kind of a bitch in this one. But that's the same reaction I had for Twilight during the pilot episodes, and she still ended up as my favorite character, so meh.
VastaKustuta>Nova
VastaKustuta>Kitten
>Nova Cat
I see what you did there.
Also, this fic was adorable. Fluttershy was in-character till about the very end (assuming you go for "shipping is all out of character". If you allow shipping to be in character, she seemed in-character the entire time). Luna was adorable, and I liked how you wrote her. Only thing that really bothered me was how short this was, and how quick the lunashy developed. Still, 5/5 from me.
"I hate you and your stupid sun. Put it out."
VastaKustutaFluttershy seems a bit OC. Telling Angel something like "Not Now" doesn't seem to fit her.
VastaKustuta"I hate you and your stupid sun. Put it out."
VastaKustuta"You'll feel better after some coffee."
Brilliant way to start a story :D
Teenager Luna is best Luna.
VastaKustutaCome to think of it, this is the best representation of Luna out there, because it also is canon (Luna is ruled by her emotions) while staying out of the spotlight (she's embarrassed and that's the is mad that the world doesn't revolve around her).
I will say, the fic was perfect save the last 5 lines, I think it would be better with friendship building rather than relationship building.
Still, Avery Strange, you've done it again.
Ill read the story later, but what's wrong with Luna's front right leg in the picture? Seems tto have gone a bit wrong. Otherwise very cute <3
VastaKustutaReally hoping for more! Well done!
VastaKustutaThis is a very sweet, in character story that made me smile all the way through it.
VastaKustutaAvery Strange, you have done it again, 6/5 stars.
So, Avery Strange did it again, only this time, it's about 200% more adorable. Lots of socks, lots of fluttercuddles, and one kitten (still counts as "lots of kitten"). 5/5 stars, would 'dawww again.
VastaKustutaI like how Luna is worked out as a pony. Loved dis story, hope to see more from author!
VastaKustutaI demand Nova fanart, now! :p
VastaKustutaAutor on selle kommentaari eemaldanud.
VastaKustutaOh pony, I love this. Beautiful stuff ...
VastaKustutaI <3 Lunarshy.
Avery Strange here
VastaKustutaI appreciate the love, I really do, but that's not why I'm commenting. I'm hoping you all can clarify a few things for me. See, I've gotten complaints that both Twilight and Fluttershy are acting out of character, and the thing is... I can't see what the problem is.
Twilight's gotten back from a long day to find that Princess Luna came and decided to take away the very pony Twilight had asked a favor of. Furthermore, while in a lot of interpretations Twilight is very friendly to Luna, what I was going for here was that Twilight was a little upset that Luna presumed she had a role in Twilight's life, that she could just come in and ask favors of Twilight. It makes sense for her to be a little annoyed particularly when the context is that Luna was going to be spending the whole day with Celestia before hand... something Twilight would be very jealous of. If I had explained these motivations better, would you have agreed with my characterization of Twilight, or is there some further problem? If so, please clarify for me.
Fluttershy... okay the shipping ramps up a bit at the end. But Fluttershy's being saying from halfway through that she's felt important to and a connection to the princess, and I thought it was fairly clear by the time we get to the part that Fluttershy calls Luna cute that both ponies are interested in another. I'm not having Fluttershy tell Luna to go jump in bed together, she's just saying that the princess doesn't have to leave yet. Again, what's wrong with this? Should I have had them part ways? Some of you have also complained about the last few lines... not my best work, but what's that bad about them?
Constructive criticism will help me to become a better writer. Criticism will just get me annoyed at you.
@Avery Strange
VastaKustutaHey, we just talked about this.
And 4 in the morning! Go to sleep!
@DooDawDay
VastaKustutaFour in the morning blog time, DDD. And I can look for multiple opinions :P .
@Avery
VastaKustutaOpinion Time! Probably some spoilers mixed in too.
Twi wasn't strictly out of character, no. Her attitude towards Luna at the end was reminiscent of her attitude towards basically everypony in the first two episodes, kind of smug and dismissive. It's not wrong per se, but it's something she (mostly) grew out of over the course of the series. Her actual relationship with Luna is, as always, open to interpretation, but the way she desperately craves Celestia's approval, it feels kind of weird that she'd act so callously towards her sister. She'd probably put more of an effort to seem friendly, despite clear signs of frustration. It would also help it sting a bit more when Luna is ultimately rejected.
As for Flutters, I dunno. As far as I can tell, she's IC. Got me there.
Last few lines would probably be improved by making what the two of them are doing a little more ambiguous (or, on the other hoof, innocent) and letting the implications ride on Celestia's dialogue in the end. Helps play up the benevolent trollestia angle, and would be kinda funny, too. Hope this helps.
@Avery Strange
VastaKustutaI don't think Twilight would see it as Luna "taking away" Fluttershy from her, as it was still Fluttershy's decision to go. Besides, Spike and Rarity were still in the library , so there wasn't really a problem. Besides, I actually can't remember, where I ever even heard of house sitting before the MLP episode, is ponyville such a bad neighboorhood that this is necessary?
Also, you say she was upset, because she was jealous of Luna, but why? This confuses me, because a) Celestia didn't have time for Luna either, so she should be understanding of Luna's situation and b) Why would she even know about it? Celestia asked Twilight, to show Luna around Canterlot and that's all Twilight knew. Or what did Celestia exactly ask of Twilight? Twilight knew in Chapter 3 of the favor, but acted somehow surprised to see Luna in front of her library. Twilight didn't care at all that she wasn't there and completely disregarded that she was politely asked a favor. Twilight could have at least told Fluttershy something or left a message for Luna / Celestia, instead of just running away because she had something better to do.
Also, so far, Twilight has always bowed to the princess. Why didn't she do it to Luna?
I can see your argumentation why she was a bit annoyed, but even an annoyed Twilight doesn't act like that.
I hope this made it a bit clearer, as to why Twilight's reaction was not quite understandable to me.
Other than that I enjoyed the story a lot. Yes, the last few lines could maybe be toned down just a little bit, it did seem a bit forward for Luna, but on the other hand, it was a nice conclusion for the story.
Ignore the people complaining about Twilight acting OOC, because the reasons everypony else stated for why she's doing this are comprehensive. This is just damned adorable.
VastaKustuta@Acriaos Well, this is exactly what I was looking for... unfortunately :P . You're making perfect sense, and I can see it now. It's one of those cases where I, being the author, can see much more than is being said and I'm failing to convey what I see. I feel like I could've made you all accept a jealous Twilight if I had explained it better.
VastaKustutaAlso, you're wrong about the bowing thing. Episode 2, Celestia's first appearance. The rest of the ponies bow, but Twilight rushes to Celestia's side in familiarity. It's a small point though.
So, thank you, all in all.
The entire scene with Twilight stuck out as a bit odd to me for reasons Acriaos pointed out above, but otherwise this was a lovely story.
VastaKustutaThe banter between Celly and Luna was fun to read, and Luna constantly mistaking Fluttershy being legitimately scared of Luna instead of just being Fluttershy was a nice way to show character growth between the two.
Adorable story, but by far my favorite part was Luna's reaction to seeing Nova for the first time in the pet store window. X3 I could visualize that scene too perfectly, in the show even. Someone should draw it as a comic...
VastaKustuta@Avery Strange
VastaKustutaAh you're right, I remembered that wrong. But i'm glad I could explain my confusion over Twilight's reaction.
Maybe it would have helped, if Twilight was shown to be more tired (maybe even covered in rainbow juice from the weather factory or something), so a harsher reaction would be easier to understand. Another option would have been, that Twilight left a note, saying she's sorry that she doesn't have time, but address the note to Celestia. This would also make Luna angry, as the favor was actually for her and not for her big sister.
Unfortunately, a jealous Twilight would be quite hard to write, as we only have Luna's point of view. I can see Twilight getting jealous, but only if there'd be a good reason and that would need more scenes with Twilight than just the one.
@Avery Strange
VastaKustutaGonna jump on the "Twilight is kinda ooc" bandwagon here, though the word I would use is "possessive". Mostly it's the way I hear the phrase "you took my house sitter" in my head. It sounds like something Gilda would say.
That said, Luna, Fluttershy, and Celestia are all well-written and their personalities bounce off each other well. The coffee, the kitten, and the image of Luna and Fluttershy walking down the street in socks are all fantastic.
This was an enjoyable story, but at the same time I think it's your weakest one yet Avery.
VastaKustutaI loved the small touches of humour, they usually got me to laugh. But I never got a feeling that the romance worked.
I must, first of all, say that I'm a Huge fan of "Kindness Reward". I felt that that story was paced Excellently. The relationship between Trixie and Fluttershy grew as they spent such a long time together. It felt natural when Fluttershy went that extra bit to take care of Trixie, how every inch she seemingly instinctively coaxed that stuck up mare out of her shell. (Isn't that called a "Florence Nightingale syndrome?)
This story never felt like it showed the same emotional progression though. While it was all Adorable, I could easily have seen Luna having just as much fun no matter which of the Mane Six she brought with her to town. Sure, the stores visited would have been different, but all six are friendly in their own ways, so when Luna all of a sudden redirects her crush to Fluttershy it feels only like that. A childish crush which, literally the day before, had been aimed at Twilight and which just as easily could have been pointed at Applejack if she had shown her a good time at a rodeo.
Ugh, I'm not sure I'm getting my point across. That's why I'm not an author myself I guess!
I also concur with most peoples opinion on the few lines Twilight have to say. She seems... Oddly upset at having her house sitter taken away. I can see that she'd need a caretaker for the Library while she's gone, but surely she trusts her friends enough to come up with a solution if the designated house sitter has to rush away for some reason?
Ah, I feel like I have more to say, but I can't think straight any longer. I once again want to say that I enjoyed the story, but I think that the actual "shipping" part fell flat compared to your other stories. I'm greatly looking forward to your next fic, as always!
Loved it. Made me laugh throughout.
VastaKustutaAnother ship from Avery Strange. Oh hell yes, I'm gonna enjoy this :D
VastaKustutaGreat story although Twilight seemed a bit off to me
VastaKustutaAh, I didn't realize you wrote Kindness Is Its Own Reward until I read the comment. Regarding your request for criticism, Twilight is already handled. The main problem for me is what others have already said: I just don't see her act so cold towards royalty, especially since its the sister of her idol. Indeed there is nothing to really base the idea she is jealous on, but even then... I still don't see her act like that. I can see Luna picking up on something that makes her believe Twilight is not comfortable with her around for some reason, or at least that she is being distant or something. But she would still treat the alicorn with respect.
VastaKustutaPersonally, I don't think Fluttershy is acting out of character. The main problem I think is very simple: The story is to short. Kindness' timespan was what, a week at least? If not more? There was a lot more character building there, Trixie and Fluttershy were given time to fall for each other. This was especially true for Trixie.
Here, they develop strong feelings for each other in about half a day. Love at first sight I guess, but it just makes for a less interesting story. It becomes slightly less believable, especially for Fluttershy. That may be what makes people feel she acts out of character. It is clear that throughout the story especially Fluttershy could be seeing something in Luna beyond mere friendship. But even then, its just a bit to quick and easy to go from that to the final scene, even mroe so for a normally shy and timid pony like Fluttershy.
Finally, I personally felt it was a bit of a shame we did not get to see more of Celestia and Luna after her day out. What we got was fun, but it was cut short.
Having said all that, I am very glad I decided to read this and I did enjoy it quite a bit.
Too cute. You've given me cavities. I'm going to send you a bill.
VastaKustutaTwilight was a tad out of character, and trollestia came on a trifle strong, but the former could have just been tired, and the latter clearly knows what she was doing. If it winds up with Luna and Fluttershy having gentle makeouts in the moonlight then Celestia can giggle at Luna's socks all she wants, in my opinion.
(I like that this ended on a subtle note. Nopony was necessarily ravished, but the possibility that ravishing took place remains, that is how it should be with these two, I think.)
Somehow I imagine the whole day was orchestrated by Celestia (twilight´s absence and attitude towards Luna, Fluttershy being at the library) because she knew Fluttershy and Luna were compatible and Twilight would not be. Then again I could just be leting my imagination run wild.
VastaKustutaThis is the first shipping story involving any of he mane six I´ve read and it was downright adorable. I specially liked when Luna sees Nova and Celestia tricking Luna into going back, It reminded me of "God" in fururama "when you do things right people wont be sure you´ve done anything at all".
@Kimba the White Lion
VastaKustutaWHAT. THE BUCK. DID YOU EXPECT?!
IT SAYS "SHIPPING". IN THE TAGS!
*rapid fire facehoof combo*
@Avery Strange
That characterization of Twilight conflicts with both my perceptions of her and with elements of your own story. You said Luna felt an offer of friendship from Twilight during her purification. And now she is upset that Luna feels she has a place in her life? What the buck? Get your consistency straight!
Another thing that I found OOC from her is that she comes off as kind of a jerk. That's not the Twilight I know and love. (Only in the first episode, and she very quickly grew out of that.) I only noticed this after your comment here, though, because you failed to convey this to me in the actual story.
I didn't feel that Fluttershy acted OOC, though. I guess they said that because of the shipping? Which makes no sense, there is no evidence as to any canon pony's sexuality, so presuming they are heterosexual (or bisexual, or homosexual) in canon is unreasonable and invalid. A fanfiction writer is allowed to fill the void with whatever they like. Especially if there's a freaking shipping tag, which always means that all bets are off anyways.
@Zanzibar
You said: "A childish crush which, literally the day before, had been aimed at Twilight and which just as easily could have been pointed at Applejack if she had shown her a good time at a rodeo."
And this is a weak point of the story... why, exactly?
I do agree with your points about Twilight, though.
Don't care what anyone else says, 11/10 read.
VastaKustuta