• Story: Ghost in the Window


    [Normal] [Sad] "...Post [it] with the hoof of an angry Celestia" - Pre-reader # 340,722
    Sounds like a ringing endorsement to me! Have fun, Rarity fans!

    Author:
    Silent Rainboom



    Description:Rarity gets a fateful letter in the mail from Hoity Toity, offering her a job at the most famous boutique in all of Equestria making dresses for none other than Princess Celestia herself. She moves to Canterlot in pursuit of her dream come true. But could this once-in-a-lifetime chance be the biggest mistake Rarity has ever made?

    Ghost in the Window: Chapter 1

    Ghost in the Window: Chapter 2

    Additional Tags:
    Fashion, Canterlot, Betrayal, Broken Dreams

    15 comments:

    1. When will people make a fanfic about Rarity being a british spy? =)

      Could turn it into an episode

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    2. Celestia wears dresses? I've never seen that. maybe thats why its a sad fic. lol

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    3. Never not Sad or Grimdark

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    4. This is shaping up to be a very nice story. I think the dialogue was very well done. You captured Rarity very well, although Topstitch and Needlepoint could perhaps be made somewhat...bitchier. Their dialogue seemed a little bland for how passive-aggressive they were being.

      Can't wait to see this continued!

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    5. You know answers to questions like the last one in the describtion is never "no".

      -
      Vegetalss4

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    6. HOLY DICKS IT'S PHOE!!!11

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    7. Oh, wow! This went up much faster than I thought it would. Thanks for the kind words everypony!

      First thing I'd like to say is that this went up on PonyDraft for editing before getting submitted, so show them some love! (Or you can find/give me feedback on Chapter 3 there too)

      Second thing is that this will have a happy ending, but I didn't want to trash anypony's day by not putting in the [Sad] tag.

      Happy reading!

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    8. I wouldn't be surprised if the ghost gives Rarity a good advice or two. I do hope that Rarity will put not just Needlepoint and Top Stitch in their place, but also Hoity Toity >:I She didn't agree to work for him, just so this could turn into "The Nightmare Moon wears Prada."

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    9. It was a bit different than most stories around here and I must say quite intriguing. I'll be waiting for more.

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    10. Huh.
      Is the sad tag putting everyone off? The comments seen strangely sil;ent and there were under 10 people reading it...

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    11. Well this is refreshing as I've only read a handful of Rarity fics. It's also nice to see Hoity Toity get some spotlight. Overall I found the plot interesting and do look forward to reading the next installment when that comes around. A solid 4/5 for a good lead.

      Suggestions: Chapter 1
      Second Page 4th Paragraph a sentence starts with a quotation marks that are not needed.
      Up to you if you want to change terms such as "people" to "ponies".

      ReplyDelete