Author: Somber
Description: An argument between her friends has brought to question Rarity'sSimply Rarity
generosity. Can a unicorn who's had everything and nothing truly be
generous?
Additional Tags: Journal, Pony Origins, Happy ending
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190 comments:
yay rarity
ReplyDelete>Happy Ending Tag
ReplyDelete:I
Oh a sad story with a happy ending! Thanks so much for that tag. I don't like sad stories cause they make me sad but if it's with a happy ending I'll definitely read it!
ReplyDeleteI like Rarity stories like this. Showing that Rarity is more than just a stuck up pony.
ReplyDeleteIt wasn't really a happy ending, but it was a powerful one.
ReplyDeleteWonderful story!
ReplyDeleteI loved reading it~
Wow, the [sad] tag is really deserving here. This was incredibly powerful, and it honestly left me near tears at the end. Wouldn't really call it a happy ending, but it works beautifully.
ReplyDeleteGood job Sober :)
Um... I'm also going to have to question the "happy ending" tag.
ReplyDelete(SPOILERS!) It's pretty obvious what happened to Unique but Rarity barely seemed to care, considering she understood it was (albiet accidentally) her fault. It was kind of jarring, since something like that could mess a person up for life - especially if they were expected to take care of another sister like Rarity is.
(END SPOILERS)
Apart from that, it was well-written and very engaging. I liked how you expected us to read between the lines instead of spelling out everything.
Gnn. No fair making me cry :( *huggles Rarity*
ReplyDelete[SPOILERS]
ReplyDeleteWell then, sad it definitely was. Because its a diary format there is little time to mull over what happens. There is not a lot of sense of emotion, or at least not as much as when an author takes the time to allow a character to mourn.
In fact, when it came to Unique, I missed what happened at first. I thought she had been taken away by the Equestria version of Child services or something, and was waiting for her to appear after Rarity had found her place. Somehow I was thinking she was Sweetie Belle. So when Sweetie Belle actually appeared, that really stung, I immediately realized what that meant for Unique. So yeah, that had more effect then if you had written a normal story and had spelled it out. Probably. So the diary format is not a bad thing.
However, I don't see how you could possibly add a "happy ending" tag. There is no happy ending after something like that.
One minor concern: AJ should have known where Rarity came from, since she was there when Rarity arrived in Ponyville. She should also know about Unique. Therefore, I find it a bit hard to believe she'd be so hard on Rarity during Twilight's party. She should know better.
@Baree
ReplyDeleteThe journal specifically said that on the playground AJ didn't recognize her (Rarity).
At first I was like:huh.
ReplyDeleteThen I was like: intersting.
After that I was like: No ._.
Then I was like: NOOOO ;_;
I think the issue people have with the journals is that they read it too fast. I couldn't read more than one or two at once (because I'm technically working. shhhhhh), and it had a much deeper impact on me. I could only see a couple events of her life, and each time it got to me (bossman probably wondering why my face is so contorted).
ReplyDeleteSo, slow down, only read a little at once. I think you'll feel much more. Back to work~
Ow. That's what I call a sad story. I disagree with the Happy Ending tag, seriously. Because there's no such thing as an happy ending after THAT.
ReplyDeleteAnyway. 5 stars. Deserves 6. I mean it.
The diary support is perfect, and the emotions are well transmitted by the text - or, more precisely, the LACK of text. The "der diary - unique" part, once you remove the 'typo error' cause with the following sentences, carry an enormous emotional load. Seriously.
Saw the charity thing coming, but not the why. Kudos on a well written character piece within a story.
ReplyDeleteWow. Powerful story, there.
ReplyDeleteThis one sure is great.
ReplyDeleteI was fine until Unique's first word... Everything from then on could only be described as the least manly tears I've shed for a fic, or anything else, in a long time.
ReplyDeleteThis was amazing.
This is the first story I ever cried while writing. I really was torn because I don't like sad stories either. I wanted readers to know that in the end it ends up okay for Rarity. But it is a sad story.
ReplyDeleteAs far as AJ goes, she met Rarity as a dirty mess where Rarity didn't even want to be Rarity any more. When they meet at school, Rarity is cleaned up. This is a reason rarity has an aversion to getting messy... it reminds her of the time she couldn't be clean.
Some day I'd love an artist to draw Rarity and Unique dancing in the falling snow, Unique wearing the coat with leaves sewn on it like a dress. Excuse me...
That was really good, full 5-stars!
ReplyDeleteYeah, good points. I'll take that. Leaves me to wonder why Sweetie Belle wouldn't move with her mother to Canterlot (assuming that is the case) but whatever, I'm sure there is an explanation for that as well.
ReplyDeleteWaaaaaaaaah! ;A;
ReplyDeleteThat was the saddest fic I ever read.
23 stars.
I'm pretty sure this is the only fanfic ever that's made me cry.
ReplyDeleteWonderful story. 5 stars.
Wow, I loved it! Very well written, and very intense. Reminded me a little of "Grave of the Fireflies" although it only has one similarity to it, really. I can see why you chose to put down "Happy Ending" as a tag, but perhaps "Bittersweet Ending" might have been better?
ReplyDeleteAh well, again, lovely story. 5 stars from me.
A good story to read. I admit that I had to swallow back my tears a few times, but at the end I did not manage to hold them back.
ReplyDeleteI normaly do not read sad stories, but this one drew my attention. Congratulations. I would give 7 stars if this would be possible.
Dang, that definitely was sad, though I didn't quite get what happened to Unique. Did she die or something? I mean, what was up with that "der dary unique"? Why was that even written in there? I didn't understand what happened. I understood some parts, but not that one!
ReplyDeleteRegardless, very emotional and touching.
I d'aaaawwwwwwed so hard at the end. It's the first time I've ever actually teared up while reading a fic. Very good job, very engaging. Keep them coming :)
ReplyDeleteLandon, what I gathered was it was supposed to be that the rest was unreadable, probably from tears. It's likely she died from the cold.
ReplyDelete;(
ReplyDeleteThe one thing I would like to know is how Sweetie Belle ended up living with Rar-
ReplyDeleteThought just hit me as I was typing this out.
*SPOILERS*
Possible explanation: Thimble adopted Rarity, which would make Sweetie Belle her half-sister.
*/SPOILERS*
It's a guess on my part, but it sounds like it could make sense.
Otherwise, excellent work. I hate it when Rarity has a tragic backstory, but they always seem to work so well ;_; I had emotional whiplash when I saw Unique's entry, and then pieced together what happened after the next entry.
confound this rarity pic for making manly tears appear
ReplyDeleteAh more manly tears streaming from my eyes.
ReplyDeleteAlways the sign of a great fic.
This was a gripping read, and would be absolutely HEARTWRENCHING if it was physically made into an actual journal, or even a set of well-shooped journal page images (hint-hint, drawfriends).
ReplyDeleteThere is something compelling about taking these happy, fun-loving Ponies and fleshing out the unknown reaches of their backstories - I've done it a bit, myself.
Rarity authorial voice was nicely rendered, and the earlier entries maintained a narrow, foalish viewpoint splendidly.
Very, very well done. Bravo!
That was way too sad!
ReplyDeleteManly tears.
ReplyDelete@Baree
ReplyDeletebut keep in mind in mind sweetie bell isn't in every episode nor does she attend the ponyville school like applebloom does. so one could assume that she is simply visiting rarity in the episodes she is in
Can't type... too busy crying...
ReplyDeleteOk, now that that's done, I have to say I loved this story! The journal-entry format was a refreshing change, the events fit into the greater story almost seamlessly, and the characters felt real. Well done.
Saying I cried manly tears would be a lie.
ReplyDeleteI cried almost like a child.
I just have to comment on this, it's beautiful, this is why rarity is my favorite pony ever, I'm happy and crying at the same time. I'm saving and printing this to read it again when I feel down.
ReplyDeleteI won't say I cried, because I didn't, but I was very moved.
ReplyDeleteIt shows us that some people are multilayered and made through tribulation. They may seem nasty on the outside, but there is a reason to this, and if you could only understand, you would see them in a brighter light.
I had to leave the room a couple times. It was all I could do to keep from losing it. Even then, the bit where Unique wrote in the journal brought me as close as I could be to the edge.
ReplyDeleteFantastic piece. The impact of the events as they transpired from Rarity's point of view, and the implications that they carried, makes everything that happened much more powerful than they would have been as a normal story. In particular, when Rarity mentioned that her parents weren't fighting anymore, I basically started feeling a sickness in the pit in my stomach; and I read the next entry of the journal about 4 times, reading it and rereading it with my mouth agape as I struggled to come to terms with what really happened.
The events built up perfectly, they flowed well, and the payoff as each came to pass nearly knocked me off my feet. The only (and I mean only) thing holding this back from pure perfection are the limitations inherent to text-only stories. A storyboard of this story would just be too much to deal with.
An excellent back story, five stars. My only wish is that it didn't take the journal format and was instead a longer tale, but I know stories, especially good ones, are far more time consuming than one expects. The journal enterties make telling a story much quicker, so I respect that.
ReplyDeleteGood work!
Madmax, that really you?
ReplyDeleteI heard something went wrong over there. Well, I'm glad you're at least in the mood to read. Nice to hear that this story lifted your mood a bit.
Hang in there.
@Melodia
ReplyDeleteJeez, and I thought Osamu Tezuka's works were depressing! If that WAS the case, then that would just send the depression factor through the roof!
Somber, this is 6 star material. I cried my god-damned eyes out. As long as this can be fanon, Rarity is my favorite pony.
ReplyDeleteAww crikey, why do I read the sad ones? I know they'll make me cry.
ReplyDeleteStill, excellent read. Well deserving of the 6 stars.
@Landon
ReplyDeleteUnique died in the cold. It was the one part I couldn't write because I thought 'who, at that age, in those conditions, would be able to write?' So those were the only words she could manage. It went from a post to a sentence to a misspelled mess of a sentence with crossed out info to simply 'unique died' to just 'unique'. I leave it to the reader to fill in the blanks. And if I could have made tear drops on the page in text, I certainly would.
I took out about a half dozen entries for length. One is Thimble adopting her and another is Thimble asking if Rarity is okay with caring for Sweetie Belle. The story is all ready long and I didn't want it longer. There's another where she manipulates some males and one where she fights for Unique's on the streets. Maybe it would have been better with them included, but it would have been much much longer.
Wow, that was really powerful. The journal format, with everything through Rarity's eyes, made it that much more powerful. Somehow hearing events through the character's own words is so much more moving than a third-person narrator trying to emphasize the tragedy. And those bits Rarity crossed out, seeing her real emotions then suppressing them was just heart-breaking.
ReplyDeleteAnd now I'm sad... But a good sad. I thought I would make it through with just a sad feeling till that little "Der dary" bit, I lost it then, manly tears, as well as actual tears were shed... I would like to see more of your work, maybe a bit more upbeat next time.
ReplyDeleteI cried during Bubbles. I cringed during Cupcakes.
ReplyDeleteI'm... Words can't describe. 6 stars if I could. This can totally be canon... And the diary-writing was absolutely realistic.
*SPOILERS*
To those complaining about Rarity's reaction to Unique's... end, just know that this is Rarity's DIARY. Sure she missed out on the details of, well, everything, but she was only a child at the time.
One of the greatest stories I have ever read.
Somber, I think the story is perfect as is. Maybe you can put the cut parts in an "editor's version" or "cut scenes" version.
ReplyDeleteI thought the tragic backstory was a bit overwrought, and some aspects of of the story clash with Rarity's canon portrayal - I don't think she'd act as dismissive of Sweetie Belle as she occasionally does with all this in mind, for instance. I don't much like the idea of the gang paying her for the Gala dresses either, even if it's there to explain the inconsistency of the song. However, the execution is good enough that these things are all pretty much totally forgivable. There's a lot of inventive and insightful details strewn about the journal entries, and I like that a lot.
ReplyDeleteThe removed content makes me damn curious, but sometimes, cuts have to be made, so I'll assume you made the right decision.
I already have a soft spot for Rarity, and a weakness for sad fics, but I was surprised I made it through the entire thing without feeling so much as a lump in my throat. I thought it must have been the plain text presentations and inferences of events and Rarity's emotions, and as I closed the tab and scrolled down the comments, the scene of little filly Rarity dancing in the snow with her littler sister crystallised in my mind; I could see their delicate hoofprints in the snow, visualise every move, every flourish of that cape, and with the knowledge of what would come next, that it would be the last time, I just lost it. Completely broke down.
ReplyDeleteI've never reacted this way to a fic, not even bittersweet, not even when I learned what happened to Pinkie in Fallout: Equestria.
To the moon with manly tears, I'm sobbing like a little kid right now.
Bravo.
Somber, I read this fic and loved it quite a bit. So let me just say FUCK YOU FOR MAKING ME WEEP LIKE A LITTLE BABY PONY DYING IN THE SN-OH GOD NOW I'M CRYING AGAIN THANKS A FUCKING LOT
ReplyDeleteOkay, no, seriously, I was on the verge of tears throughout most of this fic, around the point where Rarity and Unique started bonding, probably when she said "Warity". Reading that last page of the diary basically obliterated the emotional dam, causing an outpouring of bitter liquid sorrow to spring from my eyes. And now I look like a total pussy, so thanks for that. I don't care if I was in privacy, these were the least manly tears I've shed in a while.
So...yeah. Good job. I'd give this 8 stars out of 1 if I could, but 5 out of 5 will have to do.
This was absolutely beautiful. Well-written, poignant, and simply heart wrenching. 5/5 by far. (I also think this is the closest I've ever come to crying while reading a story.)
ReplyDeleteWow. 5 stars. I'm sorry, I can't find more words. Wow.
ReplyDeleteWhen I first watched this show, I didn't like Rarity. She was wicked stuck up and pretentious. I really don't like people like that, so she was my least favorite for a while. Even more so than Pinkie Pie (which to me says a lot looking back).
ReplyDeleteI think it took until Dressed For Success for me to actually like Rarity. Now she's 3 out of 6. :D
I don't really read fic, but there was something about this. I was daunted by the length of it when I first opened it last night, and I closed it out. I decided to give it another go today while having my dinner. Well, my dinner ended up getting cold before I even started in on it because I was so engrossed in this story. I had to stop after the Winter part and take a small break. There were surely manly tears to be had.
The rest of the story just kept my eyes watered up the remainder of the time it took me to read it. This is a fantastic fic and I applaud your work.
My heart just broke.... Thank you for writing such a powerful piece of fiction, this is truly beautiful. Tears, sincere, honest tears, were shed.
ReplyDeleteI could just use the "Fancy Schmancy" words I normally use to describe fics, but this is all it really needs.
ReplyDeleteIf this doesn't get the 6-stars tag, there WILL be Hell to pay. I'm not even joking, I cried. I admit it, I cried like a kid that was in the car when his parents just hit his pet cat with their car, and that actually happened to me. This DESTROYS pretty much any other Sad fics, and I can't say it destroys every single one of them. It even blows Bubbles out of the water, AND ABOUT AN HOUR AGO I THOUGHT THAT IMPOSSIBLE. My tears have gone beyond "Manly-Tears", way beyond. I'm kicking myself right now for almost passing this up. Dear GOD that was a good short story!
Again, to re-iterate. If this isn't 6-stars, then I don't know what is.
Edit about the "I can't say it destroys every single one of them."
ReplyDelete"I can't really say it destroys every single one of them, because I have not read every single piece of literature that has any form of sadness whatsoever."
I am so glad I didn't skip this one, like I almost did. That was a great short story, and very nearly brought me to tears. Well, ok, it did. I'll admit it. 5 stars? Absolutely.
ReplyDeletewell done. uhm, i liked it. it didn't make me cry but i did feel a tear well up at the end. again, some of the things some people pointed out i think are valid. how Rarity treats Sweetie Belle is one of them. a few other things. and you shouldn't have taken any of the entries out. it was not that long a fic and they would have answered some of the lingering questions. uh, if that's all right with you. sorry...
ReplyDeleteThat was beautiful, and really added a lot of much-needed depth to Rarity as a character. I also really enjoyed how you used the "diary" format, it was a breath of fresh air.
ReplyDeletenot the saddest thing on here but damn deserving of the sad tag and did a great job fleshing out rarity although i think maybe throwing in a line once in awhile about Uniques' absence would have been fitting. also how did sweetie belle end up staying with her when thimble left? that's pretty much the only hole i can't deal with
ReplyDeleteGot to the CMC's gift with "not toy maker cutie mark" and decided this was an excellently thought out fic.
ReplyDelete6 stars.
ReplyDeleteI know I'm asking to much but, can I haz epilogue? 5/5
ReplyDelete^Maybe one where Twilight goes up to Rarity and just hugs her? And/or allowing Sweetie to read it.
ReplyDeleteI was so close to skipping it...I'm glad I read it, but...so. Many. Tears. Shed. I lost it at multiple points of the story, and when
ReplyDelete(SPOILERS!)
der dary unique came, I knew right away she was...gone. And it hurt,Somber. A few times, I was unable to see the screen of my computer through the tears. I love it, but I hate it so much at the same time. And when I think of Rarity, holding her sister in the snow as she slips away....so. many. tears.
Wow, this story actually almost made me cry. (I have built up a really strong resistance to crying.)It was more moving than Cupcakes was creepy and disturbing. I'd even go as far as to say it surpassed Today, Tomorrow, and Forever. If something can put me that close to crying, the author really deserves commendation. Well done, Somber.
ReplyDeleteI summoned my greatest manly courage and managed not to cry.
ReplyDeleteRarity is already my favorite, but stories like this make me love her more.
This is one of the better fics I've read. It brought true manly-tears to my eyes. I would rank it right up there with Bittersweet. People (or ponies) tend to not truly realize the full height of their own potential until they've reached their lowest point in life. Rarity was brought to such a low point, and her losses are unimaginable. Her entire family, lost. Her life thrown to the cold bitter wind. It was only the kindness and generosity of others that saved her, and it taught her that money doesn't buy happiness. Money can be used generously to bring joy to others however. Best money is money given in love.
ReplyDeleteMy respect for Rarity has indeed grown as her character is developed.
I don't read a lot of fan fiction, I write even less. And I definitely haven't read any Pony FF before. However, this was so good and so moving I was astounded by how simple it was and yet how perfect. I love a good tale of sorrow, anything that can really reach my heartstrings has to be beyond the ordinary. The characterization of Rarity, the voice of the entries, the evolution of something sorrowfully deep. . . It fit almost too well.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Somber. You'll probably never read all these comments, much less one more in the back, but thank you all the same. I can't explain everything I liked about this in a comment. I think, however, I will fish my old journal out though and look at it.
Wow. That was really, really good.
ReplyDeleteOutstandingly beautiful and powerful! I look foward to seeing more of your works.
ReplyDeleteHow has Cereal not posted on this?
@Wierdplatformer
ReplyDelete*glances at author tag*
Oh wait, I have read your other stories XD
Why do I keep reading these sad stories? They always make me sad... oh wait, that's the point. This one was more so than usual though
ReplyDelete*Climbs in wardrobe crying*
I lack the skill with words to aptly describe how incredible this was, but know that it's one of the best fics I've ever read. My eyes hurt now from trying (and failing) to hold back the completely unmanly tears.
ReplyDeleteAll of the stars. All of them.
I hate reading stories liek this while in bed, now my pillow is all tear-soaked, jerk! From going from a shipping story to something of this depth...I can't...I don't...I...where am I?
ReplyDeleteI'm probably not the only one that wants a Epilogue with the cut chapters, the Lost Chapters...
ReplyDeleteThe diary... I mean Journal... is pretty old and damaged, so it is possible that a few pages have fallen out from it, lying on the bottom of the chest. Maybe a grown up Sweetie Belle finds them or maybe it's a secret that only the readers will know.
Beast. Rarity. Fanfic. Ever.
ReplyDeleteThis is why sad tags were made. It is sad but a good kind of sad. No reliance on physiologically destroying the character, just pure heart felt emotion. Yes, she went through hardships, and bad things happend, but she recovered and grew stronger because of them. All the events of her life both the good and the bad helping to shape the mare she is today. Instant 6-Star Rating.
@Anonymous This.
You can not read this story like you would any other fic. You have to read it like a journal. Slowly. One entry at a time. Pause. And let the words sink in. Remember these entries are written from Rairty's perspective as a filly as she reflects on the events that have occurred. As the mature third party reading these events after the fact, and knowing the way in witch they were written, we can gleam much from what is not said as from what is.
@SomeGuy And oh yes I cried. By the end I was fighting the tears and loosing. Just thinking about the story now makes me choke up.
ReplyDeleteI seriously enjoyed this piece. It was dramatic without being overdone, and the journal had a beautifully haunting effect. It was interesting to see Rarity grow, post by post. This was pretty freaking epic. I wouldn't change a thing.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely a tear-jerker. I had to pause several times as the gravity of each entry struck home. As others before me have said, it was beautiful, and heart wrenching.
ReplyDelete[Spoiler-ish]
On a review note, I'm still having a hard time picturing Rarity taking care of Unique. If we look at the cutie mark chronicles, Applejack wasn't much older than Applebloom at the time of the Sonic Rainboom event. Rarity looked to be about the same age as well. Granted we don't know how old they really were at the time, it makes it hard for me to imagine an even younger Rarity trying to take care of Unique much less writing so well. Given the time span indicated by the journal entries, I see about 4-5 years from the time the journal was started to the time she earned her cutie mark.
Still, timelines aside, it was a great and touching story of how Rarity would grow into the Element of Generosity.
[/Spoiler-ish]
I -LOVED- this story!
ReplyDeleteIt adds so much depth to Rarity, and explains a great deal.
It also makes me want her to find her little sister again. :/
This made my heart hurt. ;_;
ReplyDeleteMay I have this be canon with my own fic, Knights of Equestria?
Didn't cry, but it did tug at the heartstrings a bit. Didn't quite understand the UNIQUE entry until I read the comments here though. Like others, the apparent timeline weirdness (and Applejack being a jerkass in the beginning) grates on me.
ReplyDeleteThank you Sean. I'll do better next time. I tried to have Applejack cut back realizing this was more than their usual rivalry friction. I almost put Applejack in place of Twilight Sparkle, but that felt like shipping. It could only have ended in awkwardness.
ReplyDeleteDue to requests (and one threat) I retyped the parts taken out for length and submitted it. It's horribly large, but it has everything I originally wanted.
Thanks Somber, the extra parts did flesh the story out more. Don't fret about length when it comes to writing. If it was a movie, you would have to cut out various things to shorten it to keep a person watching it. But a book, even a fan-fic, is different. A person can stop reading and pick it up later without feeling like they missed something. As long as the length of the story isn't padding, and is indeed something that actually fleshes the story out and gives it substance, then keep it.
ReplyDeleteTo reiterate my past comment, Star-6. An even more deserved Star-6 with the full story.
Rarity's pretty easily my least favorite of the mane cast but you made me love her, if only for a little while. Kudos to you, Somber
ReplyDelete9001 stars.
ReplyDeleteI just want to say, I just wanted to read a fic as I had trouble sleeping, and for whatever reason I stopped here.
ReplyDeleteRarity had been one of my least favorites of the mane cast (not to say I didn't like her, just the others a bit more) but now as I sit here with tears in my eyes any time I think of her I will think of this story. In a way, with this story, she is the strongest pony of the bunch. You twisted my heartstrings and went from liking Rarity to loving her because of how strong she is.
(MINOR SPOILER)
And to those who say it isn't a happy ending, look at who she became at the end, confident, strong, surrounded by friends where one she can especially trust. She can survive on her own and take care of her other little sister… as well as give charity to those in need. That's happy… no matter how much I'm crying.
Thank you for this story. It felt very real.
ReplyDeleteNo manly tears were shed...tears, yes...but not manly. 6 Star story indeed.
ReplyDeleteConfound these bronies. They drive me to bawww....
ReplyDeleteThanks for readding the parts you'd removed. It all feels much clearer and complete now, and the added length is not the least bit detrimental.
ReplyDeleteThe first fic that made me truly respect Rarity as a character. Bravo.
ReplyDeleteYou Rock.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI am someone who can take pride in the dark depths of their soul, which which seems to be an ever expanding void, that proves to detain and then extirpate near all emotions from existence long before they can so much as be noticed. Today however, I shed a single tear for a unicorn. A unicorn who has had everything and lost it all, and is perhaps the most resilient pony you will ever know because of it. The ponies past has never been shared but with one, and through the powers of Faust and Somber, this story has been brought to light for us all so we may understand more about a character who tends to be out-shined by her more famous friends(RD/PP). This story has also reminded me of a lesson. Within the darkest depths resides the brightest light, and may Rarity never have hers die again until the day she must depart along with it.
ReplyDeleteOh, Rarity... *snif*
ReplyDelete1 single tear rolled down my cheek, and I assure you that's no easy task. Well done dude that's more than deserving of 6 stars...
ReplyDeletesimply, outstanding...
ReplyDeletebut now i kind of hate rainbow dash and applejack for being such jerks against rarity without knowing the background story :(
6 stars all the way!
Must not cry.
ReplyDeleteI would give this story a 5/5, but the damn rating part won't load properly so I have to settle for this:
5/5
you must now consciously add +1 5 star rating when averaging reviews.
6 star!
ReplyDeleteAll I can say is Thank You. Rarity is my second fav, but I always had a soft spot for her. Now its a huge bruise, but... *chuckles* I'm glad its there.
I.L.M.
Unique
I'm a super brony
ReplyDelete14 years old, tough, strong, and a great writer like you somber.
This story had my bottom lip quivering and I love stories love that.
rarity has been my favorite pony since the first episode and this really did her and her amazing story and I hope that this is brought in as truth in the ever-growing lore of equestria.
very sad,but humbeling story
5*'s though it deserves more
really did her justice
ReplyDeletesorry
How is it that stories about little cartoon ponies from a girl's cartoon can make me weep?
ReplyDeleteSix stars, easy, and I wish I could give Rarity a hug.
~Ardashir
This is so good, it needs a sequel.
ReplyDeleteSix stars.
ReplyDelete...And darn you form making my cry. Darn you to heck...
Skipped this last time due to the sad tag.
ReplyDeleteRead Rarity's Rodeo and was intrigued by the backstory and ended up here...
Wow, I'm attempting to remember this is a kids cartoon show about talking ponies but it's not helping as you just made me weep. This is an exceptionally powerful work and I'm left in awe once more in your skills as an author.
First, kudos on the use of the word "ambivalent". It is my favorite word.
ReplyDeleteThis writing is wonderful. Something a lot of authors seem to forget is that their audience isn't pants-on-head retarded. We don't need to have every detail filled in for us. While this story used the diary format to leave holes for the reader to fill in, third person limited could easily achieve the same effect.
If anyone were to read the comments down to here, read the fic again. I thought the second reading is even more heart wrenching than the first, because you can see why Rarity reacts the way she does. Trust me, it's worth it.
ReplyDeleteThat was a beautiful story. It made me cry a little bit. :'(
ReplyDeleteNo words.
ReplyDeleteTears have been shed.
Moving, sad.
6/5
After I read this fic my view of Rarity completely changed, she went from being a vain slightly OCD fashionista to being the strongest of the Mane cast and the true embodiment of generosity. The truly generous don't need to announce what they do, they do it regardless, taking no thanks
ReplyDeleteI just read this a second time and felt every tear at my heart that the first read gave. Maybe more. This is officially my favorite Pony Fiction.
ReplyDeleteThis is amazing! It's such a bleak story, but I love that it doesn't stay that way through the entire plot. The bittersweet ending was pretty powerful. The emotional roller coaster was fantastic. I love Rarity stories, and this is probably my favorite one that I've read so far.
ReplyDeleteThe entry with Unique's first words and her own entry in the journal were perfect: short, sweet, and emotionally heartwrecking. I look forward to reading more from you.
That was... There are no words. This is one of the most beautiful fanfics I have ever read.
ReplyDeleteScratch that. This is one of the most beautiful texts I have ever read.
Bravo! Bravo!
That was just.. wow... This is officially my favorite pony fanfiction
ReplyDeleteI really wish I was able to rate this story higher.
I have no idea how you would adapt this into an episode, but damn. If someone at the animation studio could figure out a way to do it justice, it should really be done.
ReplyDeleteFull marks.
So much of her past revealed... no questions left unanswered... this piece of art has the power to touch the hearts of all who read it.
ReplyDeleteTears were shed. And I hope that all readers to come will share my experience.
I'm glad I wrote something you enjoy.
ReplyDeleteI have to admit, I hate Rarity in the show. I do. I'm sorry. I found her vain, manipulative, and not particularly generous. In fact I felt she was rather a bully.
What really drove me mad though was that she was apparently sophisticated, but also practiced a 'common' skill... sewing. I couldn't decide if she was rich and slumming, in which case her passion is just an distraction, or she was poor and putting on airs. How do you get well bred sophistication but end in owning a little shop in ponyville.
The answer? Have everything and lose it all. She lost her father to suicide. She lost her mother to hopelessness. She lost her sister to love. Only after I'd stripped all that away could I then build her up to what we see in the show. Why is she so detailed oriented? It's a survival mechanism. Why is she sophisticated but Sweetie Belle isn't? They had different backgrounds. Why does she design clothes? Because it defines her life in a way she can control.
I can love Rarity now. I know the show will never show it. I suspect some day we'll meet Rarity's parents and they will be vapid, pretenious faux aristoponies who sneer on her passion. I doubt any of the creators will ever read this story, or if they did that it would ever be made. But to me Rarity will always be the pony who lost everything she was given, gained everything she earned, and shared everything she could. And if she seems greedy or superficial or pushy, well it's simply the product of an injured soul making her way in the world.
I don't think I'll comment again, because how many times can I say thank you? Well, maybe a few more. Thank you for reading it. Thank you for enjoying it. And thank you for letting me know about it.
Simply, thank you.
...wow. There's only been two occasions in the last 5 years that have left me in tears. The last episode of Angel Beats! was the first, and reading this was the second. It's fanworks like this that make me proud to be a brony.
ReplyDeleteThis was one of the best (if not the best) fanfic I've ever read. It gripped me in basically every emotion I could possibly feel. It just felt so real, so fitting, so perfect. I love it.
ReplyDeleteI got a google docs error!
ReplyDeleteI read this two months ago, and I'll give it the highest praise I can: it's got staying power. Your sucker punch to the heart has transformed Rarity permanently in my eyes. Simply Rarity is one of only two fan-fics I have reread, and it was amazing in each instance.
ReplyDeleteThanks.
I've been bouncing around from sad fic to sad fic trying to find something genuinely well written and able to live up to the tag. I checked all the 6 and 5-star stories of pretty much half the other ponies until I was irritated to find nothing that could live up to the hype. I usually don't give the short stories a second glance, but I like rarity. This is one of the finest pieces of writing that I've seen on here.
ReplyDeleteJust shy of tears, something that is no easy feat. No contest.
6-starred instantly.
I have not seen a short story like this in many a year. Its rare that a story catches you up, and makes you feel the emotions of the subjects. To taste there pain, there hopes, there dreams. To make me angry at the author for making someone suffer so much.
ReplyDeleteYet, the author has shown more clear that most will see, that our pain as well as our joys make us who we are. I have read this story more than once, and still it brings tears to my eyes.
I say, well done.
simply beautiful.
ReplyDeleteThis story is in my bookmarks. That is how much I love it.
ReplyDeleteIf you won't love Rarity after reading this I presume you are dead already or sth..
ReplyDeleteThis story was absolutely touching. Had me teary-eyed the whole way through. Fantastic job!
ReplyDelete5/5
the ending was what hit me the hardest
ReplyDeleteThe only reason i didn't cry was because i was waiting outside the factory for my buddy while reading this. I barely managed to keep my eyes dry.
ReplyDeleteRainbow Dash's gift to Twilight Sparkle made me laugh. xD
ReplyDelete...but the I remembered that it is a sad story.
I liked this one. Definitely 6-Star material. I didn't cry at this one; I did get close though. Throughout the story and Rarity's hardships, I was telling myself "Boo, this story is forced. Bad stuff just keeps happening to her to make the story as sad as possible." But I was thinking in the back of my head about the masterpiece: Grave of the Fireflies wasn't too far off from this story.
ReplyDeleteNo, none of the story was forced at all. I loved this one. I may not have cried my eyes out, but the powerful ending hit me hard. Damn good story!
At this point I've developed a sort of tolerance towards sad fics. Had I read this earlier, I would have been tearing up. I definitely felt the combined concussive force of multiple emotion bombs going off as I was nearing the end and as all those realizations hit me.
ReplyDeleteA late, but well-deserved 5 stars
This was sincerely, surely, simply amazing. I did not cry, but only because I was at work and forced myself not to. I re-read it upon getting home and the dam broke at der dary unique.
ReplyDelete5/5 but only because 5 is the highest it'll go. I deserves many more.
@Somber
ReplyDeleteOhhh... My initial thought was that Unique had written that entry. I don't know why, since the more I think about it, the I more tell myself that wouldn't work.
Looking at both perspectives, from Rarity writing it or Unique "writing" it, it still put a dagger into my heart.
Holy fucking check that was the single saddest piece of anything I've ever read. Well done. I was unfortunate enough to decide to listen to this in the background on a loop, and I almost wasted away crying. http://www.endlessvideo.com/watch?v=HWqKPWO5T4o
ReplyDeleteTears on my keyboard.
ReplyDeleteAll I can say right now.
I haven't cried this much for years. It was all I could do to finish the story before crying made it unreadable.
ReplyDelete5 stars!
I have no clue if I ever reviewed this story and I found I never did. Found it about a month ago, and I think I was crying too hard to leave a review. But now I am.
ReplyDeleteRarity, at first, was not my favorite pony. I found her selfish, OCD, and just all around, not someone or somepony I want to be around. But Dress for Success and the Diamond Dog episode really changed it all for me. She showed how generous she really is, not only with dresses, but letting her friends go ahead with their own ideas on what they thought looked beautiful. Sure you could tell she just wanted to tell them to shove it and take the dresses she made the first time, but she gritted her teeth and let her friends be happy. In the Diamond Dogs episode, she showed just how strong she really is. Her friends ultimately thought she would be in real trouble, crying in a dark, dirty cave, hoping someone would rescue her. But she proved she didn't need rescuing! She had everything pretty much under control and she did it while being a lady.
This story, just....wow. This is the third time I have read it, but each time, I have to stop at certain parts because I feel myself tearing up and my throat getting tight from the emotion. I like the journal entry feel, I was able to stop at certain parts and re-read to try to get a better understanding over what happened. Heck, even if we get something totally different in the show for how Rarity grew up, I'll always look to this as how Rarity really grew to be who she is.
Thank you so much for such an excellent story!
So, I have no idea how to get ahold of the author. Hopefully He/she will read this comment... Someone above stated this story wouls be "heartwrenching" if put into actual joural form... I would like to try that out in a way, and make a video for my youtube channel, with (probably manipulated screenshots) images with the prose text on screen, then immages of each page of the journal (made to look like Twilight is holing it, with tear stained pages, a 'handwritten' font, in an appropriate type of handwriting for rarity, etc... If this sounds good, I would really like the aothoer's permission and imput about style, font and background music. I can be contacted at my youtube channel - http://www.youtube.com/user/Th3OriginalGing3r -
ReplyDelete@Th3OriginalGing3r
ReplyDeleteSorry about my abhorrent spelling, I should proofread before posting
I feared up twice during this amazing fanfic, but the end purged me of a single manly tear. *sniff* just read it.
ReplyDeleteDang... That was.. Powerful T_T
ReplyDeleteThat "der dary - unique" was almost too much. Great story
ReplyDeleteThat was beautiful.
ReplyDeletePure perfection.
@Somber:
ReplyDelete... I hate you... How the * am I supposed to sleep after reading a story like this?! Jerk! WHAI U MAK TREVOR CRY LIK FOAL?! WHAI?!?!
... /cryforever.jpg
All my stars... I don't need them anymore... I'm too depressed...
~ Magical Trevor, Minstrel of Equestria
p.s. Trevor is tempted to write a sequel of this story as a shipping btw. Twi and Rare because she really understands Rare now. (It wouldn't START as shipping, of course. Twilight would start as just wanting to talk, try to help her move on, ect, and then it just... Kinda grows... So... I guess Trevor is asking permission to write a sequel, since it's your story, and you'd be allowed to read everything first, so that you cam make sure I'm not mis-representing her and whatnot. Please contact Trevor at [email protected] if you're amiable to such a proposition! If not, one understands, and will keep the story in one's head...)
I was really expecting "Sweetie Belle" to be a nickname given to Unique... then there's this long sidewinding thing about Thimble and her daughter...
ReplyDeleteManly tears indeed.
oh man, I lost my shit at Unique... oh man...
ReplyDeleteAnd now a moment of silence as one of the best Rarity fics on the site is contradicted by canon.
ReplyDeleteWhy did her parents had to be alive?! Dammit Hasbro!
ReplyDeleteAnd so my favorite Rarity story gets hit with the canon bomb.
ReplyDeleteCANON WINS
ReplyDeleteFATALITY
Bah, cannon doesn't matter. It's still as good a story as it was and always will be.
ReplyDeleteAnd hey, think of how fast Sindri rushed off to post that comment. Sindri loves you Somber! *Ducks*
ReplyDeleteDoes the new episode really matter? Why can't she consider herself adopted by Sweetie's parents?
ReplyDeleteAs for Sweetie not living with Rarity, eh, maybe she decided to live with her parents after all?
ReplyDeletePersonally, Trevor says Screw the Canon! Worst case scenario: This is an alternate universe. One means,this also TOTALLY ruins ANY shipping story where Rarity has lost her parents, so... What's the big deal? Sorry, but Simply Rarity is FAR to amazing to just allow it to die! Like one said, that just makes this more like FoE or Past Sins: An alternate dimension. (Though FoE is more like alternate future, but whatever. Point still stands.)
ReplyDelete~ Magical Trevor, Minstrel of Equestria
@Magical Trevor
ReplyDeleteCompletely true. This is a beautiful story, and I have a feeling I will accept this more then the cannon story.
Canon can't touch this story. It stands alone as a work of brilliant fiction.
ReplyDeleteThe show doesn't tell you if her parents were her birth parents in the episode, the only contradiction is that her parents take care of Sweetie Belle in the show, but that could be because of something that happened after this story took place. I think the two stories can co-exist just fine.
ReplyDeleteI would like to say that this was a very well done piece. It made me sob a little
ReplyDeleteSad to see canon completely destroying this fanfic("I may have been born in Ponyville", as stated in S2E09), but it will remain in my heart as part of many alternative multiverses where fanfictions occur.
ReplyDeleteThis fic doesn't say where rarity was born does it? I refuse to say this fic couldn't have happened =P
ReplyDeleteBack from being a weeping mess.
ReplyDeleteIt was excellent, Somber. I... you captured what that position is like so well.
that was amazing. *sniffle
ReplyDeletesomber...I think you have a gift you have failed to see...
ReplyDeleteI want for you to continue writing and to fully develop, keep reading, keep writing and don't ever stop.
That was so touching. As the story came to an end, tears just flowed.
ReplyDeleteThis was an amazing story, I must say. One of the best I've ever read in my entire life. Applause to you. But guys, god damn. Shut the hell up, it IS a happy ending. Happy doesn't necessarily means that everything must stay pink-colored. Somber, five stars without a glimpse of doubt. You deserve even more than that.
ReplyDelete@mycutiemarkisagun
ReplyDeleteIf you stopped ruining comment sections with your, I'm even allowing myself to say, derogatory comments just for comical relief and being the "funny" guy you'd someday become a better and more respectable person, if that day ought to come anytime. For me you looks like a 12-year old who knows how to type without typos and internet slang every two words. And still I've met 12-year olds better than you. You aren't funny. And you'll probably never learn that.
I never cried because of a fic. this was the first time. this is just the best fanfic ive ever read. before this, i just read shipping fanfic of rarity, but now i think i can never read shipping anymore, because that would just insult the rarity in this fic.
ReplyDeletefor me this will always be the true story about rarity, even if canon says something different. this is just the best, saddest and most touching story ive ever read, and i really think this describes raritys personality better than any canon story ever could.
simply rarity
This is a pretty heavy-hitting story. Even though it didn't quite make me cry, something about it just kinda lingers, and I kept thinking about it off and on all day today in a way that doesn't usually happen from fan fiction.
ReplyDeletePlus as I was reading it late last night, there was an added bit of eerie atmosphere coming from the snow piling up a foot deep outside my window. Odd I just happened to read this story the day of the first snow we've gotten for a year, and far deeper than typical around here. Gave a little extra potency to the snow scene when Rarity lost Unique. Couldn't help but look out my window and imagine them dancing together in all that snow.
this is really touching
ReplyDeleteI was reading this story and listening to Heavy Rain ost. Man, it's f*ckin incredible, you did an amazing work. It's great sad atmosphere, it's just awesome. I'll f*ckin create you a memorial made of my bones. You rock.
ReplyDelete*BWAHAHAHA* <---bawling
ReplyDeleteIt took me a moment to figure out what happened to Unique. With the episode that has Rarity's parents in it, that could easily be Thimble and her husband and instead of moving to Canterlot they've simply moved to his house and sold the boutique to Rarity. It helps explain the disparity between Rarity and her parents.
But then the brush off Rarity gives to Sweetie Belle for the sister social episode...
This left me feeling so sad... but in a good way. Very, very touching story; bravo to you.
ReplyDelete*Takes hat off*
ReplyDeleteBeautiful.
There are fanfics that are enjoyable but not memorable, and then there are the fanfics that I will forever associate with the characters involved. Even though I am not a full brony, I choked and teared up throughout the tale. This story made me care about Rarity as a "person" (for lack of a better word) instead of just as a character on a TV show. A book that made me feel similar to this story was Where the Red Fern Grows. As I progress through the series now, I will probably now think of this background for Rarity and think of ways the canon can fit this tale, regardless of inconsistancey.
ReplyDeleteI have slowly been working my way through the 6 star stories.
ReplyDeleteMost of them I dont comment on.
I had to on this, despite how old it is.
I cried.
Im not going to claim "manly tears".
They werent.
I creid.
And you made me love Rarity.
The show failed to make me love Rarity.
But you did.
Thank you for this story.
@Melodia
ReplyDeleteDamn you, I thought that was Unique writing a diary entry and I thought "Oh, how cute..." then I got to the next part and was very confused. Now that I know the truth I'm crying even harder than I was before. Thanks a lot.
I've never read a single good Rarity based fan fiction...until now.
ReplyDeleteThis honestly blew me away. It took the pony that I often consider to be my least favourite and completely put a new spin on her.
Amazing story. Deserves all six of its stars ******
Hey, it's Trevor again... Just had to comment again, since it's been awhile since I've read it.
ReplyDeleteThis is, still, far and away the most amazing in the entire fandom. FoE MIGHT be a BIT better, but considering how much time you have to dedicate to finish that story as compared to this... This is better. Thank you for allowing me to come back so that I could bawl my eyes out again at... 1:45 in the morning. I needed that... Thank you SO much, and I hope that whatever you're working on now is going well. Good night.
Oh, and um, if it's not too much trouble, would you mind, maybe, if it's okay, maybe put this on Fimfiction? You know, if um, you're not too busy that is... Sorry for bothering you...
ReplyDeleteThis is the most intense Rarity story I've read so far.
ReplyDeleteSo beautiful. So emotional. So... perfect. My only regret is that the other ponies won't get to understand and appreciate that part of Rarity's generosity (leaving the full story aside).
I always liked Rarity, but I now hold a fresh admiration for her.
Dammit, you said "Happy ending" to lull me into a false sense of security, and then you put my emotions through a wrangler. I'm not sure how I feel about being ambushed by, and then beaten about the head with compacted sadness, but this sure as hell winched fanon-Rarity up a notch in my books.
ReplyDeleteSo... I don't really understand... What happened to Unique?
ReplyDeleteManly tears; very well written.
ReplyDelete