• Story: The Midnight Run


    [Normal][Adventure]

    Author: Midnight Shadow
    Description: Twilight is approached by Applejack with a strange request - to join her that night for a run, but all is not as it seems. Why is Applejack so nervous? What could this be about?
    The Midnight Run

    Additional Tags: pagan, nature, mystery, friendship

    78 kommentaari:

    1. I shall take my rightful throne.

      VastaKustuta
    2. AND IT OPENED WITH A LESYAY

      *reads*

      VastaKustuta
    3. i really like that picture for some reason.

      VastaKustuta
    4. for some reason i love pony shrugs

      VastaKustuta
    5. So that was... interesting. I'm not seeing why it happened but it was interesting, so three stars for an average!

      VastaKustuta
    6. Half a page in and... ME GUSTA

      VastaKustuta
    7. why do I like this so much?

      VastaKustuta
    8. Huh... Not bad. Well written and interesting at points... but it didn't seem to have much in the way of a purpose...

      VastaKustuta
    9. Well that was strange.

      Not bad, though.

      Seems to be a trend, Twilight burning letters to Celestia instead of sending them. Not safe in a library!

      VastaKustuta
    10. I'm glad by the mixed reactions, really - this was a strange fic that *isn't* like things I've read before.

      I'm glad I wrote it, I do hope you like reading it.

      VastaKustuta
    11. This is a lot of sound and fury signifying nothing.

      Seriously, fuck Applejack.

      VastaKustuta
    12. ...reminds me of Equus. At least they galloped, when did you?, etc. etc.

      VastaKustuta
    13. @Anonymous

      What he said. Its interesting, but hard to explain.

      VastaKustuta
    14. people don´t seem to be getting this one! It´s actually amazing.

      VastaKustuta
    15. @Anonymous
      I understand it, and it was interesting. But it didn't feel like there was a reason to... read it. I guess.

      VastaKustuta
    16. It was good, an honest effort to show what Earth pony magic might be like. Primal, ancient, reaching back to the start. Not caring that unicorns and Pegasus ponies can directly manipulate the world around them, content with being a part of the interconnected web of life. They likely have quiet, old spells that ensure good harvests and celebrate the changing of the seasons.

      I can't speak for anyone else, but I think the fact that I've read a lot about primitive magic and religion put me in a good place to "get" the story.

      VastaKustuta
    17. Sometimes a story is just something an author needs to write, no other reason. I really like it, since it examines an instinct that humans don't really have. Very nice.

      VastaKustuta
    18. I don't like it when a story doesn't go anywhere.

      This story goes nowhere.

      But it IS interesting, and I do like the writing.

      Huh.

      VastaKustuta
    19. Somehow I'm not surprised at most not seeming to know what to make of this one, but might need a little point of reference there and a lot of those who'd read this might not have that. Loving Twilight's introduction to really old ways. besides that, reeks of that dream the conversion bureau fics have in a few, and for good reason. interesting way to see Twilight's reaction of it too, instead of just having her mull over it.

      VastaKustuta
    20. SPOILERS!! SPOILERS !!! SPOILERS!!!

      This story isn't about "going anywhere". With stories like these you have to feel them. They exist on a purely emotional level, just as Twilight's experience was on a primal and spiritual one. Just like Twilight did, you have to let your mind blend into it and follow its flow where it runs to.

      I was wondering when someone was going to get around to writing something about the ponies acting as real horses. I really enjoy the references to the ponies BEING a force of nature, not just attempting to control a force of nature. And now, I shudder to think what would have happened to Twilight if she had not tuned in to the herd when she did. *glances over at the glue factory*

      To all those who say that this story is "strange" or "uneventful", I can only say that you have to let go of civility to understand this one. Go back to tribal instinct. Midnight has yet to disappoint me with his stories.

      EXCEPT that the "vernal equinox" is in spring time (in March usually). I think he was meaning to say the "autumnal equinox" which begins to end the summer. I did notice a couple little typos (ears and ears) but nothing major.

      All in all good stuff.

      VastaKustuta
    21. wait.. "that time of the year" ???
      They only have to put up with it once a year?!? Now I really want to be a pony >.<

      VastaKustuta
    22. Ummm......That was...interesting. I'm not really sure what to say about it....Well I can say I liked it. I think I might have to read this again when I'm not at work and try to understand it just a bit better but I really do like it.

      VastaKustuta
    23. i love it 8'D

      i was hoping to see at least e litle shipping (i know the shipping tag is not there XD)

      i cant help it, i love shippings -w-

      but seriusly, i loved this one :3

      VastaKustuta
    24. That was a very enlightening story. I found it very enjoyable. :)

      VastaKustuta
    25. @NinesTempest

      It's referring to exactly that, and not only do they only go through it once a year, they re-absorb the lining instead of it tearing off and being discarded like with humans.

      It was interesting, but I feel it suffers from a lack of build up, some rite or ritual to "put them in the mood" so to speak.

      VastaKustuta
    26. Beautiful! Well done Midnight, you clearly "get" horses :-)

      VastaKustuta
    27. I loved this! Not something I would expect, but I loved it nonetheless! :3

      VastaKustuta
    28. It's... kinda weird, seeing these ponies act like actual horses.

      VastaKustuta
    29. I'm still not sure why the unicorns were allowed in. They're far more tied to their magic than Pegasi are--they use it to manipulate everything. It just seems odd to me that they'd still be able to resonate with the earth like that, even though they generally prefer more abstract magics.

      VastaKustuta
    30. @Abalidoth

      Eh, I can see it, though. Even if they do use magic for a lot of things, the unicorn ponies still have to rely on their hooves to get around.

      Other than Fluttershy, who's acknowledged as strange for a pegasus, most of them don't seem to come to ground at -all- for long periods of time, preferring to stay in the clouds, out of reach of the changes of the seasons and the everyday magic of the world.

      VastaKustuta
    31. Also, it seems that pegasi, being air-based, are the least likely to be able to tap into the ancient energy that earth ponies embrace. In the classic "four elements" view, air and earth are opposites, like fire and water.

      VastaKustuta
    32. @Anonymous

      I'll fix it and pretend I never got it wrong! damnit!

      I did indeed mean autumnal.

      VastaKustuta
    33. *pokerface*

      In the words of Twilight herself; "I don't get it."

      Maybe I'm not philosophical enough (which I find hard to believe since I contemplate existence on a semi-regular basis) I'm just not really... getting this.

      Frankly, Twilight was right. It sounded more like a cult.

      VastaKustuta
    34. it was really interesting but somehow I don't believe Twilight would just let herself be assaulted like that. Aside from Celestia herself, Twilight is probably the last pony you'd ever want to piss off. I would have found it much more believable if she had thought these people placed some kind of evil spell on AJ and lashed out at them with her magic.

      VastaKustuta
    35. @lainofthewired

      Yes! This was why I wrote it.

      We hear in the show a lot about unicorns and how powerful they are, and how fast and amazing pegasus ponies are...but earth ponies tend to get the short end of stick.

      From Word of Faust we have it that earth ponies have this deeper connection to the land, so I...explored that.

      I agonized over sending this in for about a week, since it didn't feel and stll doesn't feel quite what I intended but it's as good as I could get it and ponies who give me honest opinions on my fics said "this is good".

      I know it's not for everypony, partly at least because in it our beloved talking ponies are being...ponies.

      I originally had some saucy content that fitted in my original mental image but just looked ridiculous on paper. Maybe I should come back to that one day...I was actually asked for a sequel.

      VastaKustuta
    36. @Anonymous

      ah, the conversion bureau fic "I'm becoming a pony" dream.

      guilty.

      I do believe that the "dream sequence" may have directly inspired me to write this. Or maybe the other way around.

      VastaKustuta
    37. "Pagan Baby, won't you walk with me?
      Pagan Baby, Come on home with me.
      Pagan baby, Take me for a ride.
      Roll me, baby, Roll your big, brown eyes."
      --Creedence Clearwater Revival

      I really liked the story. It's quite unusual for the milieu of the show, but it makes for an interesting variation on the same theme of tying earth pony magic to the earth as Laurence Brown explored in "Moonbeam". Earth ponies (and unicorns) acting like primitive horses is a really interesting analogy to human pagan rituals.

      One leetle point, though—according to Lauren Faust, Celestia and Luna are supposed to embody the characteristics of all three sub-species: unicorn, pegasus, AND earth pony. Which means that they would have access to earth pony magic and rituals, too. (As Luna does in "Moonbeam".) As such, and especially given their advanced age, I would honestly expect them already to know all about (and perhaps show up themselves occasionally) on the midnight runs.

      VastaKustuta
    38. @Chris Meadows

      ooh, that's a wonderful idea. What if they go incognito?

      VastaKustuta
    39. I have a love/hate relationship with ritual conceptions like this. On the one hand, I understand that when participating in things like this, you won't get a sense of the power and magic if you hold back are are reluctant to take part in the customs.

      On the other hand, I've seen rituals like this seriously and traumatically breach people's boundaries when they weren't ready. The way Applejack treated Twilight about her bag can be really triggering in real life for some, and despite the fact that I get why she acted that way, I don't find her behavior defensible.

      So, all in all, I really enjoyed this fic, while at the same time it made me pretty uncomfortable. It was very well written, though.

      VastaKustuta
    40. @Anonymous

      In a way, the fact that the story made you uncomfortable is probably one of the more meaningful praises you could give it. As a writer myself, I know that writers want to do more than just elicit a "huh, nice" reaction. They want to affect people. That a story is powerful enough to disturb you means the author has reached that goal.

      VastaKustuta
    41. @Midnight

      They're distinctive enough in appearance (not to mention the wings) that I'd think they would sort of have to.

      VastaKustuta
    42. I.. I genuinely adored this.

      I wonder though, are Pegasi allowed to participate?

      VastaKustuta
    43. I want to say that your writing style is very effective and does get the feeling and point across, but I can't help but feel that the premise seems to undermine the authority and power of friendship. It takes potshots at a given truth and makes it seem weak, cheap, and impure. Doing so makes everything crumble into pieces and awkward to read. In essence, It contridicts itself.

      VastaKustuta
    44. I liked this one very much, though I also defintitely agree with Anonymous a couple of posts earlier where the complaint was raised about the trauma Twilight could have suffered. It seemed like learning the rules by directly experiencing them was an intended part of the process, but still, given how strong a reaction her bookbag set off I think Applejack should have warned her more strongly about that sort of thing ahead of time. If I were Twilight I'd be a bit upset about that.

      I'm left uncertain about whether to incorporate the Midnight Run into my own personal fanon. It was very powerful, but that's a double-edged sword. I don't want these ponies getting _too_ deep. :)

      VastaKustuta
    45. I dont get it what purpose does the midnight run do for the earth or even for the herd?
      The same with the buffalos in over a barrel why do they stampede for no reason what purpose does it have for them or even their village does it serve a purpose or does it serve nothing but the sheer amount of fun they have?
      I made a wall of text :i

      VastaKustuta
    46. @Anonymous

      As I said to one of the pre-readers, I took a little bit of a liberty and worked off of "fall weather friends".

      Twilight ran in that race - and she just ran. She didn't feel any need to make herself lighter, didn't need to teleport, or anything like that (also, she's an honest pony, so no cheatin') but Dash on the other hand - when she and AJ were competing, her very winged nature led AJ to tie them down for the running of the leaves.

      Pegasi, to me, *can't* not use their wings (with Fluttershy being the only real exception to that).

      It's not that they couldn't take part, but that their very nature would be anti-thetical to the idea. Maybe in a sequel I could explore Fluttershy or some other pegasus taking part...I really intended this to be a one-shot but you never know.

      VastaKustuta
    47. @Wierdplatformer

      Taking potshots how?

      To me, it's a given that earth ponies do more than just walk on four legs. I don't see the contradiction.

      In our world, such things are supernatural.

      In Equestria, this is the way things are.

      VastaKustuta
    48. @Bryan

      I'm glad it makes you thoughtful - it means a lot to me.

      I know the bag scene was traumatic, but that's what I intended. If you've never been charged at by a previously friendly and docile pony then you don't know their real, true nature

      I'm not trying to demonize anything, but I wanted to explore something that, to my knowledge, hasn't really been touched.

      By the sound of these comments, I got that at least partly right.

      VastaKustuta
    49. @zeb516

      The running of the leaves is physically what makes the leaves fall to the ground. Without that, fall would never happen and winter would never occur.

      Celestia and Luna raise the sun and moon, pegasi control the weather.

      So what do the earth ponies do?

      ...they guide the earth through the year, through the seasons, with their innate inborn primal magic. Without the Midnight Run (I'm saying) the seasons would never change. The earth/Equestria doesn't move by itself, the earth ponies move the planet.

      Celestia and Luna control the stars, moon and sun, the pegasi control the air, but the earth ponies move the entire planet.

      VastaKustuta
    50. @Bryan

      Twilight WAS warned - I never showed her reading the letter, but it was stated right near the beginning that she should come naked, unadorned by civilization. Twilight broke that rule.

      And yeah, Twilight was very upset. Her normally friendly civilized buddy AJ turned into a frantic wild animal...it's what I intended.

      VastaKustuta
    51. :3 I really loved reading this fic, I didn't think there was really any way of pulling off a pagan theme given the subject matter of ponies, but... well, I was dead wrong!

      ~Well done, I'll definitely be reading more from you soon!

      VastaKustuta
    52. This was..... beautiful.

      VastaKustuta
    53. A thoughtful piece. If you buy into the idea that Equestria is a post-apocalyptic earth, then it makes a connection to the pre-sentient horses of yesteryear, showing that not all knowledge of the past has been lost to the folds of time.

      A short fic, well written, and it's obvious the author had an idea that he wanted on paper. He explores the depths of pony lore and ability, what makes the Earth Pony special? Surely they have something beyond being a wingless, hornless breed. Word of God states this is so, but the show never tells us what that is.

      And fanfiction being what it is, we will explore that for ourselves, and so Midnight does, and I think he does a pretty good job of it.

      They are, after all, still ponies. And we know that despite their speech, they still make pony noises (such as the guards that flew Twilight to Ponyville and Pinkie Pie after tasting Rainbows) so whose to say that deep down they don't still feel those primal urges through which they can connect to the earth.

      I liked it!

      VastaKustuta
    54. I read it through and didn't really get it, so I spent all day thinking about it and reread it again.
      Now I love it, beautiful stuff!

      VastaKustuta
    55. Halfway through the story I would've given this a 2 or 3, but by the end, I understood, so I'm giving this a 5.

      VastaKustuta
    56. Sooooooooo...

      AJ is in some sort of ''club/group'' that like to act like Prehistoric-pony (super-extra-natural-hippy-ponies ?) during their 'Friday-nights' ?

      ...that's surely one heck of a definition for ''weird'' right there ?..?

      But, seriously... those are real weird ponies.
      After all, you don't see any sane human going around naked, pretending to be cavemen or monkeys ?

      Odd story, I must say...
      (It should have the *Random* Tag... prehistoric/hippy-like ponies...)

      VastaKustuta
    57. I rated 5/5. Very well written, strong imagery. Brought to mind mental pictures of ancient times. Rreally cool explanation as to how earth pony magik works.

      VastaKustuta
    58. I truly wonder why some people romanticize living like cavemen.

      So what was with Applejack's question at the beginning, she concerned that one of the stallions might try to mount Twilight?

      VastaKustuta
    59. I loved the story, full on.
      However, I can tell a LOT of people in previous comments are looking into it way too much, or wanting it to be something it isn't.
      It doesn't have an exact purpose, no.
      Its basically a oneshot. A really, really good oneshot, as opposed to full story.
      Anyway: back to the point, loved the story!

      VastaKustuta
    60. @ZarPaulus I read an earlier version of it with something of the sort in a background event, along with twilight's obsaervation how nopony seemed to give it a second glance.

      VastaKustuta
    61. magical spells really work!! I never thought there were still honest, genuine, trustworthy and very powerful spell casters until i met the spiritual helper, ayeomoni ajolaye. last week he did a love spell for me and it worked effectively and now he just casted another healing spell for my friend who has fibroid and now she is totally free and she is presently the happiest person on earth, she keeps thanking me all day..
      I just thought it would be good to tell the whole world about his good work and how genuine he is, i wasn't thinking i could get any help because of my past experiences with other fake casters who could not bring my husband back to me and they all promised heaven and earth and all they are able to do is ask for more money all the time until i met with this man. he does all spells, Love spells, money spells, lottery spells e.t.c i wish i can save every one who is in those casters trap right now because i went though hell thinking and hoping they could help me.
      his email address is: [email protected]
      if you need or want to ask me anything my e-mail is: [email protected]
      Kind Regards,
      Melinda

      VastaKustuta
    62. @ZarPaulus

      I don't know, I certainly wouldn't. For the purposes of this story though, it works. Getting in touch with your "true nature" is something all sentient, sapient life-forms should attempt though, it's very zen.

      Equestria needs earth ponies as much if not more than pegasi and unicorns - I just like the idea of it happening ostensibly behind the scenes.

      VastaKustuta
    63. @Nova25

      If you've never heard of naturists...well...

      Umm, they're not hippy-ponies. They are as necessary for the well-being of equestria as pegasi are. they way they contribute is by communing with the earth - and it's not for show.

      Remember where they live - it's not Earth.

      VastaKustuta
    64. Twilight! Such a dirty mind!

      I love the contemplation over earth pony magic (and despite it not being the first time I've read such a thing, it comes across really well!), but this story is FUCKING. CREEPY. Maybe it's just me. I find the concept of them all acting like animals as disturbing as it is exhilarating, and I applaud you for that. It takes a certain skill to really characterize an animal mind in that manner.

      What she did with the letter was awesome, though.

      VastaKustuta
    65. ...I'm commenting again. I hope you see this.

      This fic is going to stick in my mind and BOTHER me for days. In a good way.

      That excitement at the beginning, viewing it as some sort of cult, that frightens me. I've always hated initiation rituals. The willing setting-aside of the humanizing aspect frightens me. Twilight's acceptance of her place in the herd, against her duty to Celestia, that probably frightens me too.

      This is probably more about me than about the fic. (Although I saw in your comments what the Run is meant to accomplish; that is freaky brilliant!) In Twilight's place, I couldn't do something like this. I would have turned tail and never looked at my friends the same way again. This is really just an amazing piece; why doesn't it have more stars? WHY ARE YOU GUYS MORE FREAKED OUT?

      VastaKustuta
    66. I think I am too evolved for this story. Yet it is powerful. Well done.

      VastaKustuta
    67. This is a really good story, not least because humans deep down have these same sorts of "primal urges" and herd mentality. (Humans are animals too, after all.) It's disturbing to us because it provides a glimpse into the frightening underbelly of human nature.

      VastaKustuta
    68. Here it is, three days later, I am still thinking about this story. I'm not sure if that says more about me or the story. Probably me. This is one of a very small number of fics that I've thought about after reading them; certainly for this long. I'm feeling slightly unhinged.

      VastaKustuta
    69. @Midnight What I'm trying to say is that your story parralels itself to The Lord of the Flies. Forgoing reason doesn't make something right, it makes it chaotic. Having the earth ponies moving the planet is nice idea, but the way they go about it is unnecessary.

      VastaKustuta
    70. OH WOW, I had this story on my phone since its posting. I regret with every fiber of my being for not reading it sooner.

      Being close to horses as I once was. I almost cried throughout the middle and end. Really, the imagery has stuck with me, gnawed at the back of my mind for more than two weeks now. This is refreshing... Portraying them as wild. Beautiful!

      Being so close to my mare before I left my job with her ( oh, by Celestia, I cannot go a day with thinking fondly of her ) I had to learn the hard way to be accepted by her and her "friends" so to speak, especially if I had to work with most of them on a daily basis. The horses owners had a hard time accepting how I acted around them, ultimately leading to my dismemberment from them. I was claimed by three of their older mares, two foals only reacted to my gestures and body movements. My first pony contact (dallas) as well a mustang we adopted, completely flip out on other horses ( and their owners ) for getting too close to me. I had the experience of herd life. ( if only a tiny amount here and there ) Imagine a horse ( mare, my Filly ) comfy enough around you to fall asleep while you messed with her mane and tail. Imagine a Mother beating away her own daughter for getting too close to you. Imagine a little colt who would run up to you and greet you with playful nips and joyous bucking.

      Take it as you will, believe if you want, its happened. My fondest memories have been with those horses, especially my Adoptive Pony mom ( Dallas ) and best friend ( Filly ). Filly used to take my wrist and pull me around to a grazing area in the woods of the farm when no other horse was back there, she hated to be alone in those woods.

      I had a hard time not becoming emotional while reading this story. The feral reactions were really good. The imagery described later on was superb, as well as the theory of An Earth Ponies interconnectivity with the world. While this may be hard for some to swallow due to "not understanding" concerns, it was not hard me to swallow due to knowing what the actions described meant. The two grooming ponies, one pawing at the ground as a warning. The unbridled neighs for Twilights silence. The Alpha mares reaction for control, and her anger at Twilight for breaking conformity.

      While at first I felt bad at what happened to Twilight, I had seen what the whole thing was about, and why it HAD to happen. If the herd did not act towards Twilight as they did, she would not have been able to continue and begin to "understand" her part in the world-in the herd.

      The acceptance of a new "friend," even if she did not know that mare... The fact they mutually groomed each other after "sharing breath." It was just so epic to me. With "my" knowledge of horses language, I never even had to think about the interactions of Twilight and the herd. I just knew...

      VastaKustuta
    71. I do remember the distinct smells with each of the 7 horses I "shared breath" had. Also how much it meant as a greeting, or sign of respect. The horses owners hated me for partaking in that, always worried I would get bit. I always did, because if I didn't, I WOULD get bit, or kicked. But, for 8 of those 11 yrs I worked with those horse, I was never once bitten while "sharing breath." It was the greatest honor I have had the chance to experience first hand.

      While meandering around in their domain, I have been bitten and kicked and chased away for not heeding their warnings, but that stopped real fast. No, I did not correct them, I just listened, learning. As Twilight ended up doing. I became so good with those horses I no longer needed correctional equipment to work with them. In the end, I worked better with them, than their owners did. (yes I have bitten them, chased them, and kick at them to correct them if they did something I didn't like too. Which in turned earned me a few underlings. LOL )

      Anywho, with their vet amazed at how the horses acted around me, and the owners a little bit too scared for my safety I had to be let go. But I tell you now, I learned more from my herd than I would ever have another human or any kind of literature. As did Twilight, in her first herd.

      I need to take a drive, a mare has been chewing at my neck for far too long...

      VastaKustuta
    72. Unfortunately...

      This would be better understood, by those who have been around horses for a while, than those who haven't.

      I learned fast that I needed to open my eyes and ears to the horses, and had to learn to work with them, before they would work with me. I only asserted myself as a human a few times, quickly getting myself hurt in the process. (Minor injuries mind you, and one blow to the head) After that, and only AFTER THAT, did I start to listen. Thats when Dallas first claimed me, its hard to get used to a horse chewing on yer hair. . . REALLY HARD. But it was my first lesson in trust with them. And only once did Dallas try to get me to chew... that was awkward... especially for her owners to stumbled upon us with that one...Oh boy did I had fun trying to explain that...

      I have enough experiences to write about, that would take hours upon hours to read. I couldn't though, most will probably never read all of this anyway. (TLDR) I just hope the Author does, as well as a few that have been around horses with good or bad experiences.

      Horses are truly a social being, even to those outside of their species. I know first hand what it's like to have a horse reach out to you. (Joining up, or Touching up) It is an amazing feeling.

      When me and Filly first bonded, I was soo happy. Before we got her, she was unkempt for, a paint without the paint, so she was left with her brother with no human contact. She didn't take to people well. Except for her owner and me. At first that was it. She was my first experience with an untrusting filly. She wouldn't let me near her for days, I never pushed, I just hung around. Eventually she came to investigate me. I was half asleep sprawled out on the ground and she nudged me awake, lol. Then bit me, it hurt but she was testing me. After a while of patiently waiting for her to approach again I offered to share breath while she stood near me, at first hesitant, then she accepted. I guess I passed her tests because she wouldn't leave me after that. It was really hard to hear her whinny as I left for the day. I still have no doubt in my mind that she was, and still is my best friend.

      Ok now the drive...

      VastaKustuta
    73. @Doc Steedly

      Thanks for sharing - that was a REALLY long comment!

      VastaKustuta
    74. What on Earth did I just read? Whatever logic there was behind it, I couldn't follow it. You might as well have been describing random ten-second video clips for all I got out of this story.

      VastaKustuta
    75. it didn't feel like there was a reason to

      VastaKustuta