Author: UncleGrum
Description: Luna plots to take down her sister's rule, but she is being watched at every turn. She must outwit her sister if she hopes to win.The Lunar Republic
Additional Tags: Plotting, pies, illegitimate heirs, intrigue, shady politics
28 kommentaari:
Haven't read an evil Luna fic yet. This'll be interesting.
VastaKustutaGRRRR, Must think of a new title nnow!!!! D:
VastaKustutaIt was only a matter of time...
VastaKustutaYES YES! FINALLY! I was waiting ages for it...
VastaKustutaLets hope it delivers.
Down with the tyrant!
VastaKustutaMy face when I see the title:
VastaKustuta^___^!!!!!
My face when I finish reading it.
^________________________^!!!!!!!!
This rocks!
Heh. This was good. I liked it.
VastaKustutaAt first when I read it. I was like. Awwh man. Evil Luna. This will probably be serious and very dark.
Turns out I was wrong. XD. Excellent stuff bro =)
Pies are truly weapons of devastating power and destructive potential. :P
VastaKustutaWell this was awesome! xD
VastaKustutaHey, it's the author here. I don't have a blogger account yet, but I just wanted to say I'm glad it seems like most people that read it liked it. Also, @Not A Clever Pony if you're the same one who made the fan music "For the Lunar Republic," that was the song that inspired me to write this in the first place and I'll add that as an addendum to the story.
VastaKustutaI'll continue with this if it gets enough feedback. If not, I'll just try adding little scenes into it every so often for the few of you who do want more.
Hmmmm, it could be improved... by a lot. I mean, the story is unfolding way too quickly for my liking, it went through too many stages in too little time, you could stretch it by a LOT and make it more thought-provoking, and the '(Insert name) said' or '(Insert name) did' were overused. Another problem; 1000 years, each year hundreds of ideas to overthrow her sister, hundreds of thousand ideas overall, yet there is none. Also, (though it may be temporary and explained later on) you can't really feel the Luna's view, you can't agree with her and wish her luck, it would be MUCH more interesting if there was an epic conflict of views where it would leave the reader unsure and unable to decide which side to agree with and the character, Luna, seems very ignorant, if it was intended, good job, if not, well... Overall it's good story, but it could work on language and description. I give it weak 4 stars/strong 3 stars, but remember, it has potential to become a solid 6-star writing if you expand the idea further.
VastaKustutaI think that this is the second-ever Grimbright fic on the site. All the politics and tone of grimdark, but far lighter and closer to being episode material.
VastaKustuta@Anonymous
VastaKustutaThank you for your honest feedback, it is appreciated. And Luna was most certainly intended to be ignorant and unreliable as a point-of-view character.
I plan on adding a Celestia point-of-view and other point-of-views as well if I continue with this.
As an alt history fic, very well done. I look forward to more.
VastaKustutaI thought it was brilliant. I was also listening to the song it was named for the whole way through. I'd love to see where this clash of ideals and quest for revenge lead.
VastaKustutaFOR THE LUNAR REPUBLIC!
VastaKustutaSEASON 2 WILL BE OURS, BRONIES OF NIGHT!
If the light falters for even a second, darkness rushes in to fill the void....
VastaKustutaAND FROM THAT DARKNESS WE SHALL STRIKE!
ALL HAIL LUNA!
TONIGHT THE MOON SHALL OUTSHINE THE SUN!!!
Official german MLP: FiM magazin talk about Celestia as the only Pony with wings and horn and say, that she may be over thousand years old. Clearly Cencorship!
VastaKustutaAll hail Luna!
Screw Celestia AND Luna! All hail the All Powerful Eos! Long live the Principality of Eos! BANISH CELESTIA TO THE SUN AND LUNA BACK TO THE MOON! THE TWILIGHT WILL RULE!
VastaKustutaAmazing story. Very clever use of 'grimbright' themes as someone referred to them in an earlier comment.
VastaKustutaPeople are pied for days and fatally wounded by pastries, yet the story retains its humor.
I lolled at 'the lunar inquisition.'
Hope you continue this at some point because I can't wait to see Celestia's take on the events of this fanfic. Do you have a deviantart or something where I can subscribe to your work?
Too bad this story seems dead...it had a lot of potential. This seems to be the curse of referencing "For The New Lunar Republic" in the story. I've read 3 others with references in them, and they are either never finished, or they are just sub-par stories.
VastaKustutaAfter reading probably hundreds of stories on here by now, I came to the conclusion that this is awesome beyond imagination and am glad my first comment is going here.
VastaKustutaThe Lollipop Room? NO! NOOOOO!
Cotton Candy Torture Device to messy up their mane? OH GOD, THE CRUELTY!
TICKLING WITH A FEATHER?! THATS JUST SICK!!
Plotting to take Celestia down with pies? Brilliant.
I only wish there was more...
Great job. I can't find any the next part though. Has it been written?
VastaKustuta@TheArgonianScarKhan
VastaKustutaI think it's abandoned -_-
NO! I cant read this! Oh, but I must! No, you can't! Watchg me! Guh... so interesting yet... so WRONG! Guhhhhhh....
VastaKustutaNope. Can't do it. I deny its existance. But from what I have read, it is beautifully writen, well thought out, and could appease some readers. Me? No. I love Luna to dearly to read this.
VastaKustutaMan this is absolutely excellent! I seriously loved reading every bit of it, but I'm gutted there's no part 2, I desperately want to keep reading it, which is actually kind of strange, I've not felt that feeling in a super long time. I never normally read fiction these days and had been wanting to do so; heard about this somewhere and checked it out, out of pure curiosity, as I'm also a fan of the song that this is based off of. I read the feedback here and I really hope you ignore some of it. I dig the pace that the story here moves at, I think you might want to explain or expand here and there, but overall, I find this constantly interesting. I noticed some typo's too, but hey. Perhaps because I don't get a lot of time to read these days, and the nice relaxed pace and tone makes this appeal to me greatly, I consider this a unique story-telling style more than a flaw. I read a few pages yesterday but actually managed to read the majority of it and the end while at work. I was waiting up stairs for stock to be sent up in the dumbwaiter, and had it on my smartphone. It awesomely filled the time in between lifting. I loved the silly pony takes on violence, haha, and the pony methods of getting information. It's unputdownable! Please make more!
VastaKustutamy friend sent me here,i'm so confused.
VastaKustuta