Author: SuperStingray
Description: What would happen if Rainbow Dash never performed the SonicThe Fluttershy Effect
Rainboom that united the mane cast? A time traveling mishap gives us the
answer. And it's not pretty.
Additional Tags: Epic, Time Travel, Sci-fi, Cutie Mark, Alternate Timeline
55 kommentaari:
Oooh... This is interesting.
VastaKustuta"What if there were no sonic rainboom" seems to be turning into a sub-genre of pony fics.
VastaKustutaI approve. It's a very interesting premise with a lot of potential answers.
I can't wait until the second chapter!
VastaKustutaTime Travel is not safe travel.
VastaKustutaThe branching paths are always messed up if you change one single thing.
Hmmm.. rather well handled...
VastaKustutaNow if only I could figure out how my twist is gonna play out.
@Anonymous
VastaKustutaI agree. Paradoxes in stories are generally just assumed not to exist to make things simpler. Considering the microscopic factors, even bumping into someone can cause a different sperm if to reach a different egg, should they eventually reproduce, causing a different combination of traits in their offspring. If it's possible, I doubt Time Travelling would be as lenient as it is in any story ever written.
I'm intrigued by the premise but feel that most of the characters are incredibly out of character so far. And by most I mean Twilight and Trixie.
VastaKustutaI'm probably going to keep reading this but it's difficult right now...
Yeah. Lots of OOC content in there...Especially Twilight.
VastaKustutaGood cliffhanger though.
Just In Time Travel: Your temporal manipulation experts. We adjust temporal anomalies and repair paradoxes so you won't have to have generated them in the first place.
VastaKustutaOur rates are first rate. Always the lowest price.
I just needed to say that the title of this fic is absolute genius.
VastaKustutaThe only way I can think for this mess to be fixed is with the help of a good Doctor friend ;)
VastaKustutaEither Dr. Whoof or Dr. Emmett TotalOverflow.
VastaKustutaThey have a Dr. Emmett and he usually causes temporal troubles all over the place.
Doctor who? Doctor Leap! Bought a time machine parts in a shop!
VastaKustutawell, I like this story. But. duh. where the continuation& Should we wait for months like with some other stories?
This story's abrupt ending makes me sad =[
VastaKustutaI like the plot development, and the title had me laughing until I couldn't breathe. Also, unlike some of the other readers, I didn't have a problem with the characterization; I thought it was decent.
VastaKustutaThat said, there's still some ways it could be better. There are a few grammatical errors spread throughout, and some sentences look like they weren't proofed. (Like I'm one to talk; I don't proof either, but "The next morning Twilight woke up the next morning" came to mind, and should have been caught.)
Also, there's a large speech-to-description radio, and the dialog doesn't always feel natural. As a result, the dialog seems forced, like it's only there to advance the plot and doesn't contribute to characterization.
That said, I do like this story. I really do, and I'll read the next part, when it comes. The humor was great (even though I personally feel that a joke was missed when Twilight was trying to explain their urgency to man experimenting with time travel, but that's just me.)
I look forward to what comes next. I wonder if there will be an encounter between Twilight and Alternate Twilight.
That's for the feedback. This is my first bona fide fiction of any sort, let alone of the "fan" variety, so I don't really have the strongest grasp on narrative techniques yet. I agree with Ubergeek that balancing dialog and narrative tends to be my Achilles heel.
VastaKustutaI'm working on it progressively, so it's not really going to be released in chunks like a lot of the other stories here.
The Butterfly Effect was the only good thing Ashton Kutcher ever did in his acting career.
VastaKustutaJohn Trotter time-traveling without a phone-operated microwave!?
VastaKustutaMADNESS!
Well IT's time to Get your Dr. Whooves on,I Really like this story. wibbly wobbly Timey Wimey Ball in full effect.
VastaKustutaWell shit. Author seriously needs to hurry the fuck up.
VastaKustutaThe ending seriously made me think "Dun Dun Duuuuuuuun"
VastaKustutaCan't wait for the next part! :3
is there a sequel yet?
VastaKustuta>.> ninja'd so many times.
VastaKustutawell never mind, as long as there's Luna :3
Ha ha ha, oh wow! A while ago at Ponychan, in a thread, I referenced Haruhi Suzumiya by mentioning "The Melancholy of Twilight Sparkle". Then this happens. Need I say more?
VastaKustutaAUGH, BALLS
VastaKustutaI DIDN'T SEE THE "INCOMPLETE" TAG
AND NOW I MUST READ THE REST
TIME TRAVEL MAKES EVERYTHING BETTER. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Though, this is closer to Back to the Future Part 2 than The Butterfly Effect. Seriously, this is pretty awesome so far.
AUGH
VastaKustutaI missed the incomplete tag too, Hnnnnngh--
My head is full of WTF?
VastaKustutaWhile I like the concept, I think you put too much on the account of the sonic rainboom. Rarity magic were already showing her her fate before the sonic rainboom crack open the rock. It would have taken time but she would have noticed that she could detect the gems soon or later. Maybe it would kill her fashion designer carrier to not know now but she would have her cutie mark and probably had an another job probably miner or jeweller. The last one seem more like her.
VastaKustutaApplejack was already homesick, would she really stay in Manehattan if she didn't see the rainbow? Rainbow Dash already seems to love flying, racing and speed, I think that she would only find it later.
True, without the Race Twilight Sparkle would have fail to enter in this school and become Celestia student, so this part look logical. Without the Race Fluttershy would probably never discover her true talent and would still be miserable at Cloudsdale. True, this rainbow was the inspiration for Pinkamena Diane Pie, so she is probably still on the farmmaybe with no cutie mark or maybe with a rock related cutie mark.
Also, they still wouldn't have defeated Nightmare Moon, because that relied on Twilight studying under the Princess and being sent to Ponyville.
VastaKustutaI love this story. Can't wait for Part 2 ^.^
This is an awesome fic. I loved the twist in the last line...really excited to see what happens next.
VastaKustuta@BronyMike
VastaKustutaThe name's more a reference to the phenomenon than the movie.
Sorry to keep you waiting for the next part. I've just started classes and kinda busy getting my bearings, etc. Will try to add some more tomorrow.
VastaKustutaI require more.
VastaKustutaEPICSAUCE. Time paradox.
VastaKustutawhy can't I access the story archieve anymore?! my browser said it takes too long to respond. . . . help pls!
VastaKustutaI love this fic. :) It's very well-written and very interesting to read.
VastaKustutaAlthough Your Mileage May Vary on the believability of it all, I'm willing to allow enough leeway to believe it.
You should really have put the story into separate chapters, though, so that I'm not having to keep checking the bottom of the single for updates. Lol.
*the single page
VastaKustutaI never expected such a situation, as in the end of first chapter.
VastaKustutaAnd at the same time I was hoping for it for a long time
Did Twilight say the Oranges are not Applejack's true family?
VastaKustutaWhat are they then? Fake family? I don't think they'd be happy with her saying that.
MOAR!!!!
VastaKustutaHeld up by school work lately. I'll try to add more soon.
VastaKustutaI'm very glad that my random number generator gave me 110. That was quite a story, and I look forward to the continuation. I'll have to check back soon.
VastaKustutaMOAR
VastaKustutamore please
VastaKustuta@Anonymous
VastaKustutaThat was Ashton Kutcher?
Why cant i read the rest of the story?
VastaKustuta@Anonymous That's why I always thought that time travel would always be more like a "Window" so that you can't really interact with anything.
VastaKustutaY CANT I READ THE REST OF THE STORY?
VastaKustutaVery well written. The only mistake I found was you misspelled Macintosh.
VastaKustutaDespite some small spelling/grammar errors, this story is awesome! I agree with the others: this story should indeed be released in separate chunks so that we know when it updates. But anywho I really can't wait to see what happens next!
VastaKustutaso... THis gunna update any time soon?
VastaKustuta@Anonymous I think that's just another difference between the worlds.
VastaKustutaWhat's this doing under shipping?
VastaKustutaGood fanfics!
VastaKustutaY U NO UPDATE!?
^ This.
VastaKustuta