Author: Sparkler and Quill
Description: Stephen King horror meets MLP," or "Can grimdark actually be a little funny and not depend on gore and blood?" A look at an alternate path down which the episode "Party of One" could have gone.Party of None
Additional Tags: Bizarre, Horror, Alternate Universe, Humor, Creepy
69 comments:
This was simply excellent. The writing was top-notch and the characters felt exactly right. 5 stars!
ReplyDelete"Can grimdark actually be a little funny and not depend on gore and blood?"
ReplyDeleteApparently, yes. Yes it can!
Good! Cause I totally skipped the pre-readers on this since Stephen King is awesome.
ReplyDeleteJust finished reading the story. All I've got to say after reading the end is, "Ohhh shiiit!"
ReplyDeleteFinished a second ago.
ReplyDeleteIt was 20% cooler than almost any other Grimdark, mostly, because its pretty scary without actually *SPOILER* sheding blood. Also, ending was juuust perfect. Cinco Astros from me ;)
That's some terrifying nonviolent grimdark.
ReplyDeleteI think Grimdark has to be removed from the category.
ReplyDeleteSaw this coming...
ReplyDeleteLet's give it a read! :D
See, this is how you do horror ponyfic! Blood and gore can work very well as part of horror, but on their own they are just gross-outs.
ReplyDeleteWell done. :)
TWITCH
ReplyDeleteA very well written story. It goes to show violence and gore do not define a good grimdark.
Not bad, the suspence & narration was very good, and it almost puts you directly into R.D.'s horseshoes. I also like how it has some comical undertones to keep it from being to serious.
ReplyDeleteLoved the twist ending especially.
@Beau
ReplyDelete>horseshoes
I love this fandom.
And here I was expecting the equivalence to cupcakes...
ReplyDeleteYa know, throughout the whole story after it took the turn away from the episode, I was just waiting for the moment where Pinkie took things to the very violent, very gory level. Lol... had me leaned into my computer screen the whole time xD
Very well written author! Props to you, and a very great way to re-define Grimdark.
I was waiting for a story like this ever since the episode came out. People here really like using Stephen King like styles a lot in Grimdark. Great story, later
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness this was a great read... I got the same reaction as Anon#2.
ReplyDeleteSuspenseful storytelling throughout that kept itself through to the end. Hell, the ending's *still* left me feeling uneasy about what could possibly happen afterwards.
*spoiler* One of Pinky's last words summed up what I was thinking most the time, about how Dash should of just said so from the start.
ReplyDeletePersonally I think it was a little forced but over all decent.
That was weird. It's too bad Rainbow Dash was the one who came to find Pinkie in the show, because the setup is so much like Cupcakes. This is like a not-completely-depraved version of Cupcakes.
ReplyDeleteHorror doesn't have to be full of gore and blood. This works way better, very good story
ReplyDeleteCertain proof that Pinkie's insanity is totally contagious.
ReplyDelete/twitch
ReplyDeleteRD is now officially insane
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteInsane RD is scarier than insane Pinkie Pie. How DO you cure an enraged Rainbow Dash?
ReplyDelete"Crazy. Over the Rainbow, I am crazy."
ReplyDeleteThat was interesting allright. When I saw the title and the image, I indeed expected something like Cupcakes. Then I read that it did NOT depend on Gore and Blood, so I read it, and I liked it. Also, I think one reason why this story works so well is because the setup is so much like Cupcakes. You're expecting a turn in this direction all the time, but it never comes. And then, the final twist suggests a very different direction, but without spelling it out explicitly.
...that was AMAZING. i don't normally read grimdark, but for some reason i decided to read this one, and i'm glad i did. i was on the edge of my seat through most of it, the way insane pinkie was written was so masterful. like the others, i love tat this story proves how you don't need blood and gore to write an effective grimdark story. well done, five stars!
ReplyDeleteThat was fantastic. Anyone else left wanting a follow-up fic about Crazy!Rainbow Dash?
ReplyDeleteAre there any other sites that could be used to host these? GDocs' reader limit is going to get annoying after a while..
ReplyDeleteA> It would be cake to corrupt this into a clopfic. I hope someone does the deed.
ReplyDeleteB> Another ending that might have worked brilliantly would be for **SPOILERS** Dash's hopes to have her friends find her come true just after the role reversal but before the twitch. Though technically, it wouldn't even allow the story to conclude if that happened.
First thought: Pinkie Pie needs to be about 20% saner.
ReplyDeleteSecond thought: All the ponies in this town are crazy!
Final thought: Confound these ponies! They drive me to insanity!
Hi everypony, Sparkler here.
ReplyDeleteQuill and I are overjoyed at the response this has gotten. We both worked really hard on it.
It really was a 50/50 effort. I wrote Pinkie Pie and provided the illustration, while Quill wrote Rainbow Dash and worked on the grammar and formatting, with final revisions coming from both of us.
Thanks for reading!
Too many people viewing. As usual.
ReplyDeleteYou can find the story here if you're having trouble viewing because of google docs.
ReplyDeletehttp://dotrook.deviantart.com/#/d3fyg9w
This story was fucking AWESOME!
ReplyDeleteMassive props to the writers. Extremely well written, descriptive, and humorous throughout.
ReplyDeleteIt didn't really scare me, due to the humorous undertones, but that's okay, because I still thoroughly enjoyed it.
The characters were perfectly displayed and the scenarios played out wonderfully.
I give it a solid 10/10! Excellent work!
@Sparkler
ReplyDelete>mfw when there is someone with the same name as me
What the fuck?
OMG, this story was awesome...
ReplyDeleteThe slowly rising tension was great, the TWITCHs always surprised me, the two ponies and even Pinkie's "friends" were total in-character!
5 stars!
Please write some more grimdark stories like this, with less gore and more subtle horror!
Heh. "Equestrian Psycho."
ReplyDeleteThis was pretty badass
ReplyDeleteI think horror movies is a pretty cool guy, he is my favorite genre, and is not afraid of anything.
ReplyDeleteSo naturally, I greatly enjoyed this fanfic. Awesome work guys! 5 stars
Now that was a good grimdark.
ReplyDeleteHEEEEEEEEEERRRREESSSS JOHNNY
ReplyDeleteSo much for the grimdark slasher ending I've been writing.
ReplyDeleteAnd Gummy was enjoying his new chew toy, too.
Ah well, I was enjoying actually writing more than what I was writing.
Guess I'll just have to skip ahead to Dr. Oatmeal, specialist in schizophrenia and bipolar disorder..
Damn it. This is really well written, but there is no catharsis whatsoever. The ending is as unsatisfying as the ending to the actual episode. I love old tragedies, they at least give you some closure! My meager points aside, awesome story, awesome portrayal of crazy-pie, and great job with RBD!
ReplyDeletenothing i have ever read scares me, and i've read a lot of "scary" shit
ReplyDelete-and i ain't even mentally disturbed-
This story is horrible
ReplyDeleteThis story is Cupcakes for people too scared of Cupcakes.
ReplyDeleteNot saying it was bad...it was AWESOME! Nice work NOT using gore, etc!
What's the point of this psychotic GARBAGE?
ReplyDeleteJesus.
Wow, awesome story =D
ReplyDeleteI love these impressions of our beloved ponies twisted in their crazy states.
I liked the story quite a bit overall, especially because crazy Pinkie is such nightmare fodder and I love her. I'm not sure I liked the last paragraph though. It felt a little bit like a twist for the sake of a twist. The story would be just as good (or maybe a little better) without.
ReplyDeletehttp://ponibooru.413chan.net/post/view/10741?search=rainbow_dash
ReplyDeleteLoved it. It proves you don't need gore in order to be scary--In fact, it seems all the more appropriate to the show. Well, a darker take on the show but nevertheless...
ReplyDeleteThat sure was a fun read! Positively surprised how this grimdark was actually funny, well done!
ReplyDeleteawesome. my first thought was "cupcakes?" and then, "LOLOLOLOLOLOL AWESOME". +1
ReplyDeleteThank you soo much Sparkler an Quill.
ReplyDeleteI really hope they can see this post. If you know how to contact them, pls direct them here. I have not been able to draw a damn thing in over 6 yrs due to some mental stress with the passing of my stepmum . . . i read this awesome story today while at work. This image sat in my head fer 4+ HOURS. It reamed at my mind until i got home, i started on it at about 630 in the eve, and i didnt finish the linework till a little after 1am( its still not completely done yet )
http://www.ponychan.net/chan/art/src/130656016595.jpg
I drew the pic completely free hand, no helping shapes or guides. I used the pinkie pie 3d demo ( lol how ironic ) to get the idea of a few angles . . . . . and started to craft this beauty. ( i havent been more proud of something i drew . . . since ever. ) I didnt put the tail on the knife ( im sorry ) i just didnt want to hide any of her facial xpression. Hope ya guys appreciate it as much as i did the story, for inspiring me to draw again. Hopefully ill get more gumption up to do some more drawings soon.
THANK YOU!!!!
oh yeah, i didnt add the cutiemark in because i wasnt sure how it was going to scan. i have to rescan her soon because i noticed my scanner didnt scan the image right . . . . the lower hoof is cropped out and . . . its just not centered right. So i will finish it tomorrow or soon ( depends on the heat of the day/room ) and ill add her cutie mark in . . . . ooooh i cant wait n.n
ReplyDelete@Doc Steedly
ReplyDeleteAhhh! Oh that's horrifyingly awesome! :D
Love that its inspired you to draw again. Keep going!
@Doc Steedly
ReplyDeleteHahaha, PsychoDash! That's awesome -- and I'm glad we could provide some inspiration for you. That's a great pic, and I hope your streak of inspiration continues, too!
And to everypony else: Thanks again for reading and the great feedback!
Is it bad I found this story to be hilarious?
ReplyDelete@Anonymous
ReplyDeleteI spent half the story laughing at how close it kept coming to Cupcakes before going off in a completely different direction.
I liked it.
ReplyDeleteCrazy Pie is always hilarious and i'm glad that it didn't resort to blood and gore.
The whole thing could of been longer though.
After reading this, I'm finding myself thinking that this would have made a better episode than what we actually did get. Sure, it's a bit creepy, but its nothing the kids can't handle, especially if they watch Doctor Who.
ReplyDeleteHoly frick, this was insane! Very awesome story. I was kept in suspense regarding Rainbow Dash's fate, even when I knew there wouldn't be any gore/bloodshed.
ReplyDeleteThat said, I think you were a bit repetitive in referring to the characters: a lot of the time you just had stuff like "Pinkie Pie did this" or Rainbow Dash did that". Consider varying the descriptors a bit. For example, every once-in-a-while you could refer to Rainbow Dash as "the blue pegasus," or even "the young mare."
Regardless, you made the fic highly suspenseful and entertaining, without killing (or even hurting) anyone. I wish more grimdark fics were like yours.
I have read this four times. Sequel. NAO.
ReplyDeleteOh god oh man oh god oh man oh god
ReplyDeleteIs there going to be a sequel? Because considering what happened to Rainbow Dash at the end, a sequel is justified.
ReplyDeleteIm making the unoffical second part to this
ReplyDeleteI was just waiting for Pinkie to say HEEEERE'S PINKIE!
ReplyDeleteBonus points for writing a horror that didn't really rely on shock/blood to immerse the reader.
Since the description compares it to Stephen King-like horror, I liked that while the ending seemed nice at first, at the end it suggests that the horrors may not be over yet, like many of King's works.
Lot of fun to read. Confound these grimdark ponies.
Great story!
ReplyDeleteTWITCH
*clenched teeth) I hated it!
I loved it, a truly marvelous story. When I watched the episode for the first time this is exactly what I had wanted to see, a little more of the insane Pinkie Pie. The only thing that I can honestly say I wanna see now is a story of insane Pinkie Pie from her perspective. Even possibly including both insane Rainbow Dash and insane Pinkie.
ReplyDelete2/5
ReplyDeleteWhy/how is this 6 stars? I will never understand this fandom.
I can see where you tried to imitate King, but this story falls flat in so many ways, most of all that one. The writing is simplistic, dry and horribly boring (not to mention you begin with far too much episode recap). Even if you accept that "Pinkie is a serial" is kind of a thing around this fandom, there's really nothing worth reading about here.