• Story: New Tricks

    by
    [Grimdark] Sometimes I really hate this tag. A very UNFRIENDLY friend off entry.
    Disclaimer: Equestria Daily does not condone hate crimes of any kind against Tomboy Rainbow Pegasus' or any other pony for that matter.
    Description: Gilda does horrible things to Rainbow Dash
    New Tricks
    esmaspäev, 14. märts 2011 op
    Sildid: , , , , ,
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    18 kommentaari:

    1. Anonüümne14. märts 2011, kell 18:09

      WHY.jpg

      VastaKustuta
    2. Anonüümne14. märts 2011, kell 18:32

      So...umm, why do we have the star-rating system again? Are we judging on content or how well it's written?

      VastaKustuta
    3. Anonüümne14. märts 2011, kell 18:33

      I mean, yes, it's not like a masterpiece, but it's not super-awful

      VastaKustuta
    4. Anonüümne14. märts 2011, kell 18:54

      I didn't like it, and half the script was reused from Sonic Rainboom but...

      The writing's decent. So I can't one-star it the way I want to.

      VastaKustuta
    5. Anonüümne14. märts 2011, kell 19:07

      Writing was mediocre, but I enjoyed the content.

      VastaKustuta
    6. Anonüümne14. märts 2011, kell 19:44

      I really had trouble following this story.

      VastaKustuta
    7. Pacce14. märts 2011, kell 20:14

      Messy.
      And descriptive.

      VastaKustuta
    8. Anonüümne14. märts 2011, kell 20:21

      One starred

      VastaKustuta
    9. Anonüümne14. märts 2011, kell 20:30

      Grimdark for the sake of being grimdark. No story, just "these ponies die".

      VastaKustuta
    10. Daffodil14. märts 2011, kell 21:02

      Boring, poorly written, and as the others have said, Grimdark for the sake of being Grimdark.

      When your story hinges on one line of dialogue (read: the only line of dialogue) you want to make sure that line really hits home with the audience. You want them to -feel- it. Make it good.

      Punctuation helps.

      VastaKustuta
    11. Anonüümne14. märts 2011, kell 21:19

      very lamesauce couldn't keep reading it, not enough interesting content

      VastaKustuta
    12. Anonüümne15. märts 2011, kell 07:23

      I rather grimdark ponies than lingerie ponies

      VastaKustuta
    13. Anonüümne15. märts 2011, kell 08:28

      I'm sorry but it was not very good.

      And if Gilda so carefully planned this out, why did she think she could escape while severely injured *and* carrying a body not much smaller than herself?

      I'm no writer, but maybe you should have spiced up the ending with a defiant last stand, or possibly even Gilda realizing what she had done and being crushed by regret

      VastaKustuta
    14. fagbutts15. märts 2011, kell 10:58

      thanks for the feedback guys, and ive taken it all on board.

      In my defense, this was kind of a request someone had for something to submit, and I'm trying to make some of the things I write shorter. My usual stories are much, much longer. It was kind of a first attempt. I do have some other fics that are longer, and people have said are better, maybe I'll show them if you'd be willing to read

      VastaKustuta
    15. fagbutts15. märts 2011, kell 11:02

      But just so I know, would you say the writing is worse, or the content?

      VastaKustuta
    16. Pacce15. märts 2011, kell 14:48

      @dasalasa
      I'd say the writing was fine, it was just perhaps TOO straightforward.
      Beyond the colourful descriptions of carnage, I'd say the most interesting thing was how Gilda herself was willing to die just to hurt Dash and that she even stole her body for reasons I'd prefer not think about.

      VastaKustuta
    17. Anonüümne12. juuni 2011, kell 03:06

      I think the first commenter summed it up nicely. WHY?

      First off, this was not that well written. It was very blunt and a little painful to read.

      Second, the subject. Just... Just why? I mean, I've read Cupcakes and Rocket to Insanity. They seeed to hold a point to them. Compared to this? Ugh....
      1 star.

      VastaKustuta
    18. Present Perfect26. juuli 2011, kell 12:59

      A blandly written, entirely pointless story.

      VastaKustuta

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